Sun & Moon

TWENTY ONE

The gentle waves of music playing in the background, along with a slight tap on his shoulder, wake Taeyong up. He makes an effort to open his eyes, but it feels like lead weights are hanging off his eyelashes. As he sits up straight, he feels his back crack and stretch, making him more awake only by a margin. "Hmhhphh?" he mumbles as his vision clears. The sound of music feels more distinct, and Taeyong notices the hairstylist standing in front of him. There is exhaustion on her face but also a look of satisfaction, like an artist standing before her Starry Night.

She smiles gently and takes the apron off of Taeyong. "You're finally done! It looks really good." She blushes slightly, and her eyes widen at her own words. "Well, I meant," she rushes to say, "I'm not complimenting my own skill." She clears her throat and glances away. "I meant you look really good. Here, look." She moves aside to let Taeyong look at the mirror.

He blinks and nods slightly, although he had only been half-listening. Taeyong looks at the mirror, but he can't see anything, probably because he thinks he's still sleeping. A moment passes, and reality finally reminds him of the reason he is where he is.

"What do you think?" the hairstylist asks softly.

Taeyong cannot believe his own eyes, and he finally becomes fully alert. The person he sees in the mirror no longer looks immature and sloppy. A seemingly composed Taeyong stares back from the mirror. Without his messy tomato hair, Taeyong seems more mature. He looks like the clean-cut news anchors he had admired for so many years.

The realization that the person he sees is himself hits him hard. "Hair makes this much of a difference?" He feels a warm wave of confidence wash over him with leftover bubbles of slight embarrassment. "Why did I even use Kool-Aid before?" he murmurs under his breath. He turns to the hairstylist and grins widely. "Thank you so much! You're amazing!"

Taeyong looks at himself one more time in the mirror and winks to himself. He can't help it. "Wow," he says. "I look like I actually eat three meals a day!"

. . .

Taeyong stands outside and calls Doyoung. The wind tickles the back of his neck, and he watches leaves gently scattering on the sidewalk. The sky is showing signs of darkening soon, and the previous gentle blue is replaced with pink clouds and a lavender hue.

Taeyong notices that Doyoung has picked up, but before he can say anything, he is interrupted. "I have to apologize. I won't be able to pick you up," Doyoung says, his voice laced with coolness.

"Wait, what?" Taeyong shakes his head. "Did something happen? Do I have to walk home?"

"It is what it is. I understand it's incredibly rude of me to suddenly do this. I'm very sorry. But something came up." Doyoung is about to hang up, but the sudden tepidness in his voice sends off alarms that Taeyong cannot ignore. It makes him panic that there is no annoyance or badger in his voice. He can only hear the smooth voice of a distant businessman, and it feels wrong.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Taeyong feels like a boulder smashing through a thin wall of glass, but he feels that if he doesn't speak now, he'll regret it. "Doyoung, um, listen. You don't need to say anything, just listen." He takes a deep breath and continues. "I thought that maybe we were starting to get along. I was really glad that you decided to help me. You even approached me first! But you suddenly doing this is weird." He pauses and looks at his shoes nervously. "Did I do something wrong?"

There is an audible sigh through the phone, but it doesn't seem like one of annoyance. It sounds like debilitation and surrendering. "It's a personal matter, Taeyong. I apologize again, but I have to go."

"WAIT!" After crashing through the glass wall, Taeyong is now a fast-rolling ball, skidding down a hill with no means of stopping. "As I said, I thought you were getting used to me. I really like being around you, y'know? Uhm. So." Taeyong now glances up at the sky. "I hope you don't feel alone. If things are a bit unsettling for you right now, I hope that you don't force yourself to act like some emo robot. You're human, and you can't help but feel certain ways. There's nothing wrong with that. Even if you don't like it, I'm here for you. Uhhh. So, yeah, please treat yourself better." Taeyong is stuttering at the end, and he feels his right ear burn red the way it always does whenever he feels embarrassed.

There is a horrendous moment of silence before Doyoung speaks. "Why did you tell me all that?"

"I don't know. I felt like you needed to hear it." Taeyong puts a hand in his pocket and sighs to himself. "I'm sorry if I'm being pushy. I just wanted to let you know that it's alright to have some useless emotions. That's just how we are. And I feel like you haven't done anything useless in a while. And you should. For your own sake."

Doyoung is quiet again before he speaks. "Okay. I'll keep that in mind." Taeyong thinks that Doyoung's hung up before his voice speaks one last time. "Thank you."

As he puts his phone in his pocket, Taeyong smiles to himself and begins to walk home.