Learn the rules quickly
There's a chill that crawls up Taehyung's spine as he stares at Jeongguk from across the hall. It almost feels like they're facing off, but there's no fight. Jeongguk looked distressed, confused, like all the fight had left his body, and his eyes are watery, pleading.
There's a clamor behind him, and suddenly Mark and Jinyoung are at his side, throwing their arms around him and whooping.
"Look at our champ!" Mark bellows, shaking Taehyung, but he doesn't even register it, just letting his body be throttled as he stares at Jeongguk. He's not quite sure if he can breathe at the moment.
Yoongi had gotten the text too, sent from Taehyung's phone, though Taehyung hadn't been able to find it yesterday. When he saw the pictures, and who the pictures had been sent to , he'd had the sudden urge to vomit. He had raced through the halls, trying to find Jeongguk, to take him somewhere and explain, but there were too many people here.
"Didn't think you'd make it, but you went above and beyond this time, Taehyungie," Jinyoung says proudly, clapping him on the back. He points at Jeongguk. "This was a slippery one."
Taehyung clamps his teeth down on his bottom lip, and he can taste the iron on his tongue. He needs to stop this. He needs to tell the truth. Protect Jeongguk.
"I-is it true? Taehyung?" Jeongguk asks shakily, looking like he's unravelling at the seams.
They're making a scene, he knows, because everyone's crowding around them now, watching like it's some sick, twisted drama on television, and not someone's fucking life.
"It was all fake?"
"You have a duty to yourself, and the family. It's time for you to grow up."
Namjoon's words resound harshly in his head, and he winces. He finds himself nodding, and he can't be sure why. Why am I doing this? Jeongguk lets out a choked sob.
"You're lying. You're l-lying."
It's the hope in Jeongguk's eyes that kill Taehyung. That shining hope, getting duller and duller by the second. He wishes he had enough faith in them as Jeongguk had in him.
"If the media got a wind of him and your relationship, they'd tear him to shreds. He wouldn't last a day in our world. And it's only going to be a trainwreck. Is that what you want?"
Deep down inside, he knows Namjoon is right. And if he twists this enough in his head, he can pretend this is for Jeongguk's own good. His protection, his well being. He scans the crowd, and everyone's eyes are on him, waiting for a response. It's oddly symbolic. Just like Namjoon had said; everyone was looking at him. He had a reputation to uphold. He needed to grow up.
This wasn't the way he wanted it to go. He wished he could explain everything, tell Jeongguk how much he loves him, how much it hurts . His eyes catch on a figure standing in the crowd-- Minah. She's smirking, holding Taehyung's phone in her hands. Karma.
He didn't want Jeongguk to be the center of more unwanted attention, more ridicule and hate. And yet here they were. And Taehyung knows there's no going back from this.
He can feel the weight of peer pressure weighing down his tongue as he speaks. "It was all a g-game, Jeongguk," he says, voice faltering, and vision blurring at the corners. He doesn't want to look at Jeongguk, he's a coward, he knows. But he can't take his eyes off the younger boy-- the boy he loves so much. He wishes he could show Jeongguk his heart, how much it aches , how sick this makes him. He needs Jeongguk to know that this isn't a game. That everything he says is a lie.
But there are tears streaking down Jeongguk's face, cheeks flushed with shame, embarrassment, the heated glares thrown his way. His shoulders are hunched, just like that day on the roof. The first time they had really talked. Where did it go wrong?
"You should learn the rules quickly."
Taehyung has never hated himself more than in that moment, watching Jeongguk's face crumple in betrayal, hurt, and standing rooted to the spot as the younger boy turns on his heels and runs down the hall, pushing past the crowd of people and disappearing around a corner. No amount of self hatred could quantify it. He felt like he'd ripped his skin off and set himself on fire.
"That was cool, man," Mark says, shaking Taehyung by the shoulders, but Taehyung's still staring at the spot where Jeongguk had last stood. He takes a deep breath, looking up and blinking the tears away.
"You need to grow up."
"I know, right?" Taehyung says, forcing himself to smirk and get dragged away. As he passes the cheering crowd, he locks eyes with Yoongi, and all he sees is disappoinment. He looks away.
***************************
