i have endured. [the story of nobody at all]

death dies.

this is a point where things began to weigh very heavily on my mind and soul. everything collapsed. i feel like part of me, if not the vast majority, died that day.

"i am sitting here and i really don't know what i want to say yet. i'm not feeling anything, and at the same time, feeling far too much. i am in such an incredible amount of pain and i do not know what i can do to make it stop. i just feel so helpless. at the same time i am so grateful for those i do have. those who have not left me. without them i would be even more alone than i already am. beside no one but myself and my broken heart. fuck it though, it does not matter. i just suffer. i have not really learned anything. nothing good anyways. i think i am just confused as to why all of this has happened to me. people have always told me that i am a good person, that i deserve good, but i've received hardly any of it. especially recently. i have been dumped by several people, crucial. my heart is broken. my heart is gone. i have nothing, i am nothing.

i begged the world to stay, i watched it walk away. "

my heart had been taken away from me at this point, and i haven't seen it since funny enough.

i am in constant pain.