There's No Way

I've Got This

[Shawn's POV]

"I don't care if I'm not actually pregnant, I'm still gonna go in on this pizza like I'm eating for two," Camila proclaimed, proudly grabbing another slice. I was unable to hold in my laugh, she had to be the cutest human being I had ever seen.

"So, you're feeling better now that the tests were negative?" I asked curiously. She pondered her answer for a moment or two before answering.

"Yeah, I mean I would love to be a mom someday – but on my own time, not someone else's. And as much as I know I would love my child no matter what, I can't lie that it would be extremely difficult to have a physical reminder of that night with me forever." I nodded in understanding at her well thought out answer.

"Do you feel like it gives you a sense of closure? I mean, I know you can't just pretend it never happened with a snap of your fingers, but does it help?" I inquired. She looked at me with furrowed brows for a moment before taking a deep breath and opening her mouth to speak again.

"Actually, I kind of wanted to talk to you about that...the whole 'closure' thing..." she said. I could tell she was nervous and I had a feeling I knew exactly what she was about to tell me, so I scooted closer to her and took her small hand in mine, intertwining our fingers.

"I'm all ears," I replied honestly.

"I want to file a police report...I think," she responded.

"You think?" I questioned. She quickly shook her head and took another deep breath.

"No, no. I am going to file a police report. I'm just terrified, I mean if we go to court that means I'm going to have to see him again, right? And like, talk about what happened? Publicly? That sounds horrifying. I mean...I haven't even really told you what all happened..." Her words trailed off at the end. She was right, she hadn't necessarily told me in detail what had happened that night, but I had more than enough context clues to have a pretty good idea.

"You don't have to tell me," I said comfortingly. I swear I saw a tear forming in her eye as she spoke up again.

"I know...but I have to tell someone," she said with a sigh.

"When are you thinking you want to file the report? I mean, what if you started going to a therapist? Maybe it'd be easier if you work through some things on your own first before getting the authorities involved." Her eyes were glued to mine as she considered my idea.

"I mean, technically I can wait like 5 years before filing a report but I definitely don't want to wait that long. No matter how long I wait though, it's still just going to be my word against his in court...and I probably could benefit from a therapist." She said, thinking out loud.

"We can look up some local therapists after dinner. And it wouldn't just be your word against his. I think I technically count as a witness. I could testify for you..." I suggested.

"You'd do that for me?" She questioned, her eyes lighting up in disbelief. I leaned in slowly and pressed my lips against hers for a brief yet intimate moment.

"I'd do anything for you."

----

[Camila's POV]

After cleaning up our little living room pizza picnic, Shawn had grabbed his laptop and sat down on the couch. I cuddle up next to him and watched his screen as he proceeded to research the best therapists in our area.

"What about this one?" he asked, turning his laptop to face me. It was the 'About Me' page from the website of a local shrink. Her name was Penelope Harris. She seemed to be in her mid-40s, dressed very posh, graduated with honors, and specializes in victims of sexual assault. I grabbed Shawn's laptop and explored her website for a bit.

"She seems really good," I said quietly. I hovered the mouse over the 'Book an Appointment' button for a moment, but didn't click it. Shawn must've noticed my hesitation.

"Nervous?" he asked. I gave him a silent nod in reply. "I can go with you if that'd help. I mean, I don't think it'd be a good idea for me to go back with you...but I could sit and wait in the lobby for you. Would that help?" I gave him a shy smile and nodded.

"I'd really appreciate that," I said. I leaned in and placed a quick kiss to his cheek before turning back to the laptop and clicking the 'Book an Appointment' button. She had an opening right after work the next day, so I reserved that one. I felt both relieved and terrified, but once again knowing that Shawn would be there too brought me an immense amount of peace and comfort. I closed the laptop and set it on the coffee table before propping my legs up on the couch and cuddling into my love's chest.

----

I was nervous; Shawn knew I was nervous. Luckily, he knew exactly how to calm me down when I was feeling this way. Throughout the entire day at work on Monday he found little ways to make me feel better, my personal favorite method being the sneaky kisses. He snuck enough kisses at work that it wouldn't surprise me if we found out that everyone at work knew we were together and were just pretending like they didn't. I was pretty good at hiding it, but you'd have to be damn near oblivious to not notice Shawn's relentless flirting or sweet touches or sneaky kisses.

Soon enough it was 5 o'clock and our coworkers were cramming themselves through the doors, eager to get home. I, however, felt like my heart was in my stomach and my throat was closing up. The symptoms eased when I felt a strong hand gently placed on my shoulder.

"Hey cutie, you ready?" he asked, his smile beaming. I sighed heavily before standing up confidently.

"Ready as I'll ever be." I grabbed his hand with one of mine and grabbed my purse with the other. We talked a lot on the way there, but never about the situation itself – another one of Shawn's tactics to calm my nerves. My breath hitched as we pulled into the parking lot. His hand squeezed mine as he parked the car.

"You're going to be just fine, Mila. You've got this." His words were coated in confidence; not confidence in himself, but in me. I took a deep breath before undoing my seatbelt and repeating his words.

"I've got this."