❝Suga Hyung ❣ I want to receive that message too. After this, please send me a message saying you love me too❣❞
Wₕₑᵣₑ ₐ ₛᵢₙgₗₑ ᵢ ₗₒᵥₑ yₒᵤ ₗₑₐdₛ ₜₒ wₒₙdₑᵣₛ
Started on: 04:16 PM, 22 March 2020
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"I tried really hard to not cry... now they'll all think I'm pathetic" Jimin mumbled to himself as he entered the bathroom and opened a certain cupboard, taking out what he desperately needed.
A blade, he hadn't thought about self-harm in a while, or to be exact he hadn't felt this disgusting in a while so he did what he was the best at doing, he punished himself and cut himself.
Not too much though, he couldn't let anyone see him this way. If he lost too much blood he would faint, he couldn't afford that to happen with their busy schedules.
He wasn't dumb enough to kill himself either, not because he cared about himself but because he didn't want the others to hurt or the band to suffer.
He'd have to make it through somehow, so after half an hour he stopped and washed off the blood along with taking a bath before applying medicine to the cuts and wrapping a bandage around his left arm.
He then blow-dried his hair and put on a full-sleeved white shirt along with a hoodie, although it wasn't winter the weather was quite chilly nowadays so it was going to work. He took a deep breath and opened his room's door, he was scared obviously but the best solution that came to him was to pretend nothing had happened.
Just because he was pathetic didn't mean he could use it as an excuse to ruin his career and disappoint ARMY. The rest of the boys meanwhile had talked when Jimin had rushed into his room.
"How... how long has this been going on?" asked Namjoon with a dry throat, SeokJin sighed "I only found out a month ago but apparently it's been going on ever since the wings era..." "That's... since 2016? It's been 2 years?" asked Yoongi with wide eyes.
"That's when Hyung fainted during our practice sessions, starved himself and exercised a lot, ending up losing fifteen pounds. But h-he said it was only once, like an s-stupid phase!" said Jungkook.
"Then... no, no way that's just dumb, you're probably mistaken Hyung" insisted Taehyung "We saw it ourselves just now Tae" mumbled Hoseok. "You shouldn't have done this though Hyung, confronted him in front of all of us" said Yoongi.
"I know Yoongi but he needs more people watching him and he wouldn't have said anything unless I did this" said SeokJin "That's true but what if he doesn't come out of his room?" asked Namjoon.
"Knowing Jimin he'll pretend like it never happened. He hates confrontation so with seven of us watching him he won't do something that requires it. It's selfish of me but I'll be a bad person if it means helping Jimin this way" said SeokJin after which there was nothing but silence.
"Don't we need to leave for practice?" asked Jimin entering the kitchen as he hopped onto the counter grabbing an apple as he did so. The others looked at him in awe for he had pulled it off so easily, it even felt as if nothing had happened an hour ago.
The harsh reality however remained "Yeah, let's go guys. Manager-nim is here" said Namjoon dropping his leftovers in the bin, the others one by one followed and did the same.
The boys then headed to the Mercedes Benz that awaited them downstairs and got in one by one. The van consisted of two separate seats each from the front to the middle while the back consisted of three-seaters to accommodate a maximum of nine people including the driver and passenger seat.
Therefore the first two seats behind the driver were occupied by Namjoon and SeokJin, the middle ones by Hoseok and Jungkook, and the back ones by Jimin, Taehyung, and Yoongi.
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Once they were all done with their choreography and recording, the next was the Love Yourself Answer Jacket shooting sketch, basically shooting for the album's concept photos.
Once they were also done the tired boys were headed back to the dorms, tired and most of them sleep. That was not, however, the case with the three in the back "Hyung?" spoke Taehyung breaking the silence as he nudged Jimin "Mhm?" "I'm sorry"
"Why?" "We've been best friends since we were in high school and you've helped me with all my problems although you had yours all along. I'm sorry for not being there for you. Even if you didn't want me to meddle I should have noticed, I'm really s-sorry that I d-didn't think you w-would be going t-through anything and I n-never asked you. If i-it wasn't for J-Jin Hyung I would've n-never known, and I c-call you, my b-best friend... I'm r-really sorry" sobbed Taehyung as he broke into tears eventually.
Jimin immediately hugged his best friend "It's not your fault Taetae. I just didn't want anyone to know. I didn't think about how much I'd hurt you guys if you found out, I'm sorry too that I didn't share anything with you and hid it all instead" mumbled Jimin.
"Y-you'll stop right? s-starving yourself and o-overworking. Y-you should k-know you're p-perfect already" said Taehyung, Jimin just smiled "I'll try"
A lie, Yoongi knew that deceiving tone for he himself was an expert when it came to using it. He did not however say anything and just pretended to be asleep until they reached the dorms. The moment they entered Jimin was the first one to leave to his room and flop on the bed, covering his eyes with his arm, already blaming himself.
He'd done it again, made everyone worry about his pathetic self, he'd created another problem for them while they all had a busy schedule. He'd made Taehyung cry, that'd never happened since their trainee days.
Taehyung crying because of him would be a memory that'd haunt him for a while, something that his brain wouldn't let go. He'd hurt the only person who had been there for him since the very start, it was all his fault. The nightmare woke up Jimin at midnight as he headed to the kitchen only to see the lights already turned on.
"H-hyung, why are you awake?" Jimin asked Yoongi "Can't sleep, you?" replied Yoongi "For water" said Jimin truthfully "Jimin-ah, can we talk about what's going on with you?" Yoongi asked.
As much as Jimin had been planning to stall around his favourite Hyung for as long as he could by making an excuse, his plan was gone in a second as he shook his head and turned around. Only to be grabbed by Yoongi from his left arm, Yoongi did not miss how his Dongsaeng had winced and flinched slightly before removing his arm from his Hyungs hold.
Yoongi however only grabbed it again and pulled up his sleeves which resulted in Jimin's bandages showing, the Hyungs eyes immediately filled with pain and tears at seeing the physical harm Jimin had caused to himself "W-why... Jiminee, look at me" funnily enough Yoongi didn't say anything like Jimin had expected him to. There wasn't a lecture or a scolding or any specific crying, not even questions.
Yoongi instead hugged Jimin whose eyes widened as his Hyung rubbed his back "I'm sorry you have to go through this, I'm here for you Jiminee. Come to me if you ever feel like you're hurting again okay? I can't make everything alright but I can help you. Hyungs here for you, everything will eventually be fine" he mumbled, there was silence for a while before it broke with Jimin's loud sobs and cries.
Which soon turned into wailing and many tears as he clutched Yoongi tightly who hugged Jimin back just as tight and muttered comforting stuff and continued to rub his back until everything once again calmed down to only hiccups.
"H-hyung. I..." "I know Jiminee, I promise it'll be all fine. You trust Hyung right?" asked Yoongi pulling back slightly from the hug to wipe the younger's tears, Jimin nodded. Yoongi then kissed Jimin's forehead and added "I'll make everything fine, I promise" Jimin smiled and suddenly yawned.
"Let's get you to bed okay?" "Hyung?" "Mhm?" "Can we c-cuddle?" Jimin asked shyly not daring to look up, instead of an expected no he was met with a chuckle from his Hyung "Course we can, anything for my favourite Dongsaeng"
Jimin's heart lit up at that very unexpectedly fast as all negative thoughts about Yoongi hating him from the past few days left. Favourite Dongsaeng! Jimin couldn't help but giggle in excitement which certainly did not help with the older's heart rate as he led them both to Jimin's room.
The rooming was basically individual rooms, the first room on the full right belonged to Yoongi, then the next room was Jungkook's followed by SeokJin's then Hoseok's, Jimin's, Taehyung and lastly Namjoon's.
Just as promised Jimin was granted his request as Yoongi literally jumped on the bed making Jimin once again giggle before the older opened his arms to invite the younger for cuddles with the lejindary gummy smile.
Jimin immediately gave in and that was how both of the boys slept that night, basically spooning each other.
