Remember When...?

41.

March 21st, 2020

Ally

It's been four days since I've had any contact with anyone. The only people I've conversed with were my parents and Oscar; when he made stops to my room to ask what I'd like to eat or to bring me food. It's the only time I open the door really, aside from letting Bane in because he would scratch and whine at the door. Other than that, I've been completely isolated.

I can't really tell you the thoughts I've been having as of late, but I can tell you that I've been doing a lot of thinking. Too much really. I kind of wish it would just go away.

I change Liam's diaper, then lay him back in his crib. I head to the bathroom to wash my hands, then make my way downstairs for something to eat. I had my mind set on a PB&J sandwich because I kind of wanted to give Oscar a break. He needs it.

I'm cutting up my sandwich when Ben comes up the stairs from the gaming lounge.

"It's as if the universe wants me to be miserable." I murmur.

"Ally, can we talk?" He asked, ignoring my comment.

"You said everything you had to say." I murmur again, turning to put the knife in the sink. "Liam and I will be out first thing in the morning."

I then grab my sandwich and head to the stairs, Ben right on my ass.

"You don't mean that." He exclaimed.

I ignore him as I open the room door with my butt. He walks in after me and I sit the plate down on the bed. I zip up my suitcase.

"Ally." He said.

I ignore him as I pack up last minute items. He grabs my arm to stop me from moving. I snatch it away from him, my eyes full with tears.

"I let you get too close to me. And each time, you fuck it up. None of this would've happened if I had just stayed in Phoenix to begin with." I confess, continuing to pack stuff away. "Everyone I get close to always leaves me in the end. This was the last straw for me."

He grabs me again, turning me to face him. Before I can give him a piece of my mind, he kisses me. Rough but passionate. My mind spins around in circles for a minute before I successfully push him away from me. We look at each other, both of our breathing heavy.

I wipe my mouth. "Don't ever do that again."

He holds his hands up in surrender, but looks at me deeply. "One thing I will not apologize for is meeting you."

I turn away from him again.

"You're the mother of my child Ally. I'm sorry I led you on, only for it to be a fake. You really do deserve so much more, and I hate that I'm such a fuck up." He exclaimed. "Too naive and too ignorant to realize that I have a good thing right in front of me. Too busy chasing something else instead of being grateful for what I have."

I continue to ignore him, tears slipping my eyes.

"I'm sorry I insulted you Ally. I just....haven't been the best in the relationship field for a while now. I act like I know what I'm doing, when in reality I don't have a damn clue. So you have every right to be mad at me." He added.

"I most certainly do. Because I have no idea what possessed you to believe that I was going to be a shitty baby mama. You clearly don't know a damn thing about me." I argue, placing the suitcase down at the side of the bed.

I turn to face him again.

"You can leave now." I say.

"No." He replied.