Sanders Sides Oneshots

°Kidnapped(Demus)°

Deceit was cooking. He hasn't heard from Remus in a while, which was fairly surprising, but Deceit wasn't complaining.

Suddenly, his phone rings. One of his extra arms reaches out and collects the phone, answering the unknown number.

"We kidnapped your boyfriend." The man on the other end of the line says, right off the bat. Deceit raises an eyebrow.

"Have you, now? Remus Sanders?" Deceit asks, flipping the grilled cheese.

"Yeah." The kidnapper responds.

"I'm assuming he's asleep right now?" Deceit asks.

"Yeah, why?" He responds. Deceit chuckles.

"Ah. When he wakes up, tell him to be home by five and that I have a grilled cheese for him in the fridge. If you can." Deceit says.

"What?! No-" Deceit cuts the man off.

"Oh, and one more thing." He says. The man is quiet. "Good luck. You'll need it."

Then, Deceit hangs up, placing the phone back on the counter.

~•~•~

At 4:30, Deceit was sitting in the Commons, his feet kicked up onto the table, reading and drinking tea when Remus busts down the door.

Deceit looks up at him. He was covered head to toe in blood, wood splinters, and chicken feathers. Deceit takes a sip of his tea.

"Welcome back, Remus. I heard you were kidnapped." Deceit says. Remus gets a confused look on his face.

"Wait, really?" He asks. Deceit chuckles.

"I'm assuming the strange man told you nothing that I asked him to tell you?" He asks.

"No," Remus responds. Deceit sighs.

"Well, I told him to tell you to be home by five, which you are thirty minutes early, and that I have a grilled cheese for you in the fridge." Deceit says, taking another sip of his tea.

"Ooh, really?" Remus asks. He's about to make his way to the kitchen when Deceit stops him.

"Ah, ah, ah. Go clean yourself up first. Make sure the chicken feathers go in the trash and not down the drain, please, those will be hell to clean out and I'll make you do it." Deceit says. Remus groans.

"Fine." He huffs, making his way down the hallway.

(Just some funny shit after all the angst. You're welcome :)))

(365 words)