05-07
Everyone's an asshole.
I deal with them everyday. I just hope you won't be able to deal with them in the future.
But I guess that's the way how our life would be like.
Nothing changes. Our hate will always be there. It just grows from time to time. I wonder how big it will be in your time.
Mine can already fill an ocean. Yours must be a galaxy.
I can't see how we will end up. Right now, I just want to kill myself. Disappear, rather. Gone. Vanish. Since kill is a horrible word. And it hurts too.
But you know what? All I've been doing so far is making excuses. Twenty years and all I ever did is make excuses. I couldn't do things because I don't believe I could do them so I just make excuses.
What I really want? I don't want anything in particular. I don't have goals . I just want to kill people. Terribly. I just want them to shut up for once. They talk so much. They make me feel bad about myself. There is nothing wrong with me but people think something is wrong because I act differently among them. I can't stand it. I want to choke them all to death. Want to make them shut up their mouth. Want to cut their throats and tounges. Want them to know someone like me exists. That I don't need to be like them to live in this world.
I'm sorry. I just had enough of this day.
I don't know how to live. Everytime somebody speaks, I feel like I wanna strangle them to death. This is how my day is. It's suffocating.
YOU ARE READING
100 Letters To My Future Self
RandomTo anyone who might be reading this: This isn't a story or any other writing piece related to any character or a person other than me, but a diary-kind of personal letters written for my future self to read. Most of the contents here are private but...
