Insomnia // Billie Eilish

Chapter 43

I banged on the door. "Somebody help me!" My voice broke. I'd been yelling a lot. I kicked the door over and over. "Fuck my life." I put my back against the door and fell to the ground, putting my head in my hands. I squeezed my eyes shut and let out all of my anger and frustration in the form of tears. I slammed my elbow against the door and throw my head back. There wasn't even light peeking under the door anymore. I didn't even know how long I'd been in there or how long they planned on keeping me there. I just hoped it wasn't the whole weekend.

-

My head fell as I started falling asleep.

Loud footsteps rung throughout the halls and my head snapped up.

I quickly stood and knocked on the door. "Help me!" The doorknob twisted for a minute and then the door swung open. Billie, the principal, and a police officer stood on the other side. I jumped into Billie's arms and let out a sob. She put one hand on the back of my head and the other around my waist. I pulled my head back and wiped my face. "How'd you know?"

"After you didn't reply to me for a while, I went to your house to see if you were there. When you weren't, I used Life360 to track your phone." She squinted and shook her head. "Speaking of, why didn't you just call somebody."

"Because not even Olivia and Bryant are dumb enough to not take my phone. I think it's in her locker."

"Who put you in there, Ms. Jones?" Mr. Eddlemon, the principal, asks.

"Olivia Harms and Bryant Walker."

He tilted his head. "Are you sure? They're such good students."

"Yes, I think I fucking remember who locked me in a damn janitor's closet."

"Well, I mean... it's just hard to believe—"

"Dude, she said that it was them! Get over yourself and do something about it!" Billie crossed her arms. "Look at her neck. Look at her eye. Look at her lip. This is what they do to her." I swallowed, nervously.

"Y-yes, ma'am," he stuttered. "I'm sorry for the inconvenience."

"Just fix it or I'll get my lawyer on your sorry ass."

"Okay, Ms. Jones, I need to ask you some questions." The officer motioned for me to come over to her.

-

Billie lightly scratched my back. "Are you okay, Mackenzie?"

"Billie, I've already told you multiple times. I'm fine."

"Yeah, I know, but like are you actually okay? I don't want you to tell me what I want to here. I want you to tell me how you're feeling."

I sighed and looked up at her. "Okay." Her hands play with my hair as she patiently waited for me to go on. "I usually don't feel very great. A lot has been going on and I can't really do anything about it. I kind of just always feel... anxious, I guess... and empty." I shrugged. "But you make it all go away. I always feel safe and happy around you, so just please don't go anywhere and I'll be fine."

She kissed my forehead and smiled. "How could I?"

I sighed. "I need to study. There's only three weeks until exams."

"And then you graduate."

"And then I graduate. I'll finally be out of that hell hole."

"Speaking of graduation, if you're eighteen, shouldn't you have already graduated," she asked.

I chuckled and rolled my eyes. "I failed kindergarten."

She looked at me skeptically. "How the fuck did you fail kindergarten?"

"I apparently wasn't mature enough to move on to first grade."

"No shit?" She sat up, looking very amused. "What'd you do?"

"Well, for starters, I never kept my mouth shut. I always talked back. I wasn't nice to other kids." I laughed. "I used to walk down the aisle of the bus everyday, and I'd hold my backpack in one hand and my lunch box in the other like this." I held out my arms to show her. "And I'd hit everybody in the back of the head as I got off."

"That's funny as hell."

"Mm-hm."

"So..." She drifted off, playing with her rings. "Can we talk?"

My heart skipped a beat, the question making me anxious. "Yeah."

"At the end of this month, I'm going on tour."

"Oh." I tilted my head. "Why do you look so sad? Isn't that good?"

"Well, I love tour but... I don't think you understand." She shook her head, grabbing my hand. "I'll be gone for months."

"What?" I raised my eyebrows. She bit her lip and looked down. I wrapped my arms around her neck. "Hey, it'll be okay. We'll make it work."

She let out a shaky breath. "Okay."