The soccer boy❤️⚽️

my decision pt. 2

Two days later..

These last two days have been so amazing, I've made the best memories with the best people. I'm just soaking it all up, for the rest of my life. I told the group I was going to run an errand for my dad and I'd be a few hours. They all nodded and said bye to me. I went into our room where Mattia was, I told him the same thing, saying it was going to be a few hours. He frowned and got up, hugging me.

Mattia: I'm gonna miss you.

Riley: yeah me too.

I hugged him tightly. He pulled away and kissed me slowly, not passionately or anything. Just softly, and it felt nice. I smiled before leaving the suite and getting into my car. I wasn't running an errand for my dad, I was following through with my plan. No baby, no risk of him leaving me, happy ending. Right? I hope so. I parked in the parking garage and walked into the building, and got total Edward scissor hands vibes. I walked up to the front desk.

Riley: hi, I made an appointment yesterday? Riley Cosentino?

Lady: Riley Cosentino......abortion?

I slowly nodded. She told me to politely sit down and wait for my name to be called. I took a seat and watched the walls. Filled with words.

Life, is a beautiful gift.

That felt like someone punched me in the stomach. I started having second thoughts, thinking..until..

???: Riley Cosentino?

I got up, and walked into the room. She told me how the procedure was gonna go, and that they'd only keep me here for 2 hours after it because it's fast. I nodded my head, going into a sweat. The doctor put her hand on mine.

Doctor: I've done two abortions before. You'll get through it just fine.

I nodded my head, feeling like shit. They led me to a room and had me put a gown on. I walked out, in the gown, looking around the room, tons of women getting ready for the same thing as me. I sat down quietly. Next thing I knew, I was on a hospital bed, wires attached to me, getting ready for the big moment.. I tried stabilizing my breathing but it was really hard. The nurse told me.

Nurse: you ready?

I slowly nodded. She put the mask on me and I felt a tear stream down my face.

???: get ready to operate.

Nurse: 3...

Mattias face flashed in front of my eyes for a quick moment.

Nurse: 2....

There he is again...

Nurse: 1...

Riley: no wait...

I hardly mumbled before everything went dark, and I had a little montage in my head...

then boom. Everything went dark again, and I opened my eyes, I saw Mattias face appeared, smiling. It was the day at the beach, when I was being carried to the water by him and Kairi, and everything went in slow motion just for that quick moment... boom.

I woke up in real life, looking around. Not too much was on me, just some IV's and a breathing tube. I looked at my scar, very slight, hardly noticeable. I remembered everything...what have I done?

I felt tears stream my face, and my stomach hurt. I prayed to god that my baby wasn't actually gone, and all the sudden, I felt a hole in my heart, ripped out of me. That's when I knew....my baby was dead.

I waited the 2 hours and got used to walking with the scar.  They handed me a bottle of pills, they instructed me to take one every day for the next 4 days and that way everything would be out and clean. I was released and went to my car. I drove home in silence, tears falling rapidly from my face. Regret filling me every mile I drove away from that hospital.....

like I said, you guys would be mad. 😬 BUT THERES MORE