Loving someone is hard, to keep them safe is even harder (Loki and Male!Reader)

Part 20 - Scared

No ones POV...

Frigga was sitting on the biggest table, Loki ever saw in his life. Dexter called for a cook and Loki listened in.

"How long until Fox is here with the food ?"

"He will be here in 10 minutes, he said so himself."

Dexter nodded in understanding.

"How long until everything is done ?"

"The first throw will be done in 20 minutes, then the second one in the same. Shall we cook everything ?"

"Yes. I promised Mr. L that we cook everything."

"Did he respond ?"

"He did and he will come with two of his guards."

"Okay. We shall make everything ready."

"Good. Good."

With that the cook left and Dexter went into the house again for somehing. A few minutes later and a huge car drove inside the garden. Loki never saw a built street there, but there was one. Maybe it was under gras again... Like the pool... Then another came and 3 more followed. Everyone hurried to the LKWs. As they opened the backspace everyone cheered and pulled out packages. They dragged them to the cooks and they began working. The boiler was huge af. And there were 2 more of them ! Loki was amazed and startled as Fox sat down next to him, huffing in exhaustion.

"Hi Loki.", Fox greeted.

Loki nodded in acknowledgement.

"Fox.", he said.

"What is bothering you ?"

Fox poured Loki and himself a glass of water and Fox started to slowly sip it.

"I do not get it..."

"What do you not get, Loki ?"

"Dexter told Frigga a false name of himself. He called himself Daniel Drow..."

Fox choked on his drink.

"WHAT ?!", Fox yelled shocked.

Loki looked at Fox in curiosity.

"What do you think about all of this ?"

Fox stared at Loki in pure shock.

"I have to go somewhere. I will be right back."

With that Fox stood up and went away. Loki slumped down in his chair, alone once again... Frigga noticed. She put her hand on his shoulder. He whipped his head around and looked at her.

"What is wrong, my son ?"

Loki opened his mouth, then closed it again and then sighed.

"Daniel Drow is a false name...I don't know if I should tell you the real name, nor do I know why he lied..."

Frigga smiled at him softly. She stroked his back.

"I know. He lied with a reason."

Loki looked at her in question.

"I saw the lie in his eyes. He is hurt and hardly trusts anyone. I guess that he is afraid that I will tell on him and pull him into trouble. Years of loneliness, hate, pain, betrayal, anger and self loathing can break someone's soul. Daniel is falling apart. He needs someone he can love and hold onto, the same is then also awaited from the person he chose to stay with and love. If the feelings are just from one side, it will not work. He needs help."

Loki's eyes widened in shock and realization.

"I love him...and he loves me...", Loki whispered.

Frigga looked at him in confusion.

"What was that, Loki ?"

"I love him...and he loves me...", Loki said louder.

She smiled at Loki brightly.

"That is great, Loki ! Don't let him slip away."

"But there is a problem..."

Frigga lost her smile and looked at Loki in concern. Loki looked at Frigga with many emotions.

"Daniel gave me a choice... Either I leave for good and return to Asgard, forgetting him and the others, never visiting him ever...or I become like him. Immortal. It will never be able to change back. Once chosen, never undoable."

Frigga's eyes sparkled.

"I do not see a problem there, Loki."

"You would die some day and I would never join you in Valhalla. We would never meet again. I would miss you."

Frigga frowned. Loki had tears in his eyes and sobbed.

"Loki...look at me.", Frigga said softly.

Loki did as told.

"You do not need to miss us. We are always with you. In your heart is always a part of us. Do not throw that chance away, to be with someone, you love, forever. This is not about us, but about you. What do you want ?"

"I...I don't know !"

Frigga gave him a soft smile and stroked his cheek, wiping away his tears.

"Listen to your heart, my son. It will lead you to your safe future."

"I do not know how."

"It will tell you with time."

"I am scared of the future. What if my heart is gone ? What if I do not have one ?"

"Loki...just because you are a Frost Giant, doesn't that mean that you do not own a heart or deserve love. Do not be scared. You will make the right choice and I will always approve and support your decision."

"Really ? You wouldn't...hate me ?"

"Why would I ? You finally found love. I am happy for you. I thought that you either die as a man in loneliness or Odin would have forced you to marry someone and have a forced family. That you found love on your own, are great news."

Loki smiled at her and then frowned.

"Forced ?  He still will, if he ever gets me. He is someone, who loves to marry royal bloods to royal bloods. He would still force - marry me with someone I do not know, like love. Thor as the 'Golden child' has always a choice of everything, while I never have had any. Odin always forced me. He hates me with a passion and...he loved it to hurt me, no matter how, where, when and with what. He never cared about me."

Frigga frowned.

"Why would you say that ?", she asked.

"Because I know so ! I am just a brute of Jotunheim ! Just a stolen relic ! A peace - offering ! Bait !! I have no rights in the presence of the Allfather ! I am like his slave and guard - dog !! As long as I serve him, I am worth something ! But now...I am useless and I have to go ! I am a waste of space now ! The Allfather will KILL me !!! He lied to me so many years ! Always pushed me away ! And as I finally found out the true reasons of why, he said that I was suddenly HIS son !! I never was his ! He never acted like I was ever his son !! Just some monstrosity ! I am a Monster in his and everyone elses' eyes ! He USED me for his own work !!"

Her eyes widened in great shock. Loki hugged himself tightly.

"I never had a life worth living for. Everyone favoured Thor more than me. I was just air and no one cared.", Loki choked out.

It hurts...Everything hurts.

"Even fine men and woman played me. They snaked their way into my heart, earned my love and trust and suddenly I have had to find out, that they fooled me to have a one night stand or something...or to get closer to their actual gaol, Thor. I never ravished anyone, nor I let them ravish me. My heart got broken more than 2 times. I am not sure that it will be different this time...", Loki whispered, sobbing quietly.

Frigga looked at him with sympathy. Now she understood. He was scared to make the wrong choice, shattering his heart into trillions of tiny pieces. She hugged him tight and he returned the hug, letting it all out.

Little did they know that some people of Dexter eavesdropped on them and felt pity for him. He was so insecure, lost and broken...