The Rise And Fall Of The Stag And The Doe

beside you

"When's the last time you checked on him?" Marlene asked, her voice barely carrying as she leaned against the counter.

"Twenty minutes ago." Sirius replied evenly.

"I can't tell if we should be worried or..." She made a gesture, scrunching her face up in confusion.

He glanced out to see James still sitting on the grounds. "I stayed with him all last night. I think he needs a bit of space. We can smother him later."

"I'm more worried about tomorrow." Marlene admitted.

They both were still dressed in their sleep wear; Marlene wore a long baggy grey shirt and short shorts, her hair was up off her face and she wasn't wearing any make-up. She looked even more pale than usual. Sirius was in a plain t-shirt and his pajama bottoms. He too looked worn and exhausted despite the several attempts to fall asleep. His hair didn't look sleek, smooth or graceful at all. It was askew in a way that would have worked on James, but looked wrong on Sirius.

The pair of them couldn't look at each other, any time they did their eyes began to water and they remembered why they were there in the first place.

"Everyone will be there." Sirius stated, leaning back on the cabinets. "I don't know if that will make it better or worse."

"There's no way of knowing."

"Where's mum at?" Sirius questioned.

"At the funeral home with Dorcas."

His eyebrows lifted in surprise. "Meadowes went with her?"

"She didn't want her to go alone and...I just couldn't do it." Marlene said her voice trembling slightly.

Sirius nodded in understanding. He too couldn't handle going and he felt a little of the pressure ease off his chest at the idea that Marlene had felt the same way. It was one thing if he ran from his feelings, but if she did it maybe then it was more complicated than that. Maybe this was just something that it was better if someone...less connected helped.

"Have you talked to Lily?" Sirius wanted to know.

Marlene shook her head, grabbing her cup of tea and taking a large sip. "I haven't had the chance."

"She said she worked everything out with Dumbledore. We can stay as long as we need to and anybody that wants to come tomorrow he will help get there."

"Good."

"Want some?" Marlene gestured to the teapot.

"No."

She frowned, "You should eat something."

"So should you."

Marlene shrugged, "I haven't been hungry."

"Neither have I."

She laughed, it wasn't a real laugh, there was no warmth.

"What?"

"Everything."

Sighing, Sirius walked over, grabbed the cup from her hands, put it down and pulled her into a hug. She laughed again, but didn't fight it. Instead she slid her arms around his waist and let him hold her. It was against her better judgment and as soon as this crisis was over they would go back to their unspoken arrangement. They had both lost a father. Yes Marlene had a dad, but she grew up with Mr. Potter just as much as she had with her own. And James's family was all Sirius really had so it was as good as losing his own father. The next day they would get behind James and be there for him in every way possible. But for right then, Marlene rested her head against Sirius's shoulder and he gripped the fabric of her shirt tightly. Both of them leaned into each other and closed their eyes. They eventually pulled away and went their separate ways. Sirius went to bring James something to eat and Marlene started cook lunch, but they didn't look at each other again.