Used To Be [A Bensler Fan Fic}

Chapter Twenty-Four

Joseph and the rest of Elliot's family weren't brought up in the house. It was an off limits topic, and Olivia and Elliot didn't really miss out on talking about it. They were fine with keeping all of their conversations about happy things. Especially the child they found out they were expecting a month after Joseph was rushed to the hospital.

"I hate this." Olivia sighed, as she moved into the house late one night after work. Elliot was at working, covering one of his co-workers shifts, so Alex had volunteered to watch Rory for them.

"Hate what?" Alex asked, as she turned to look at her friend.

"Being so exhausted this early in my pregnancy. With Rory I was like beyond exhausted for the first like four months." Olivia sighed.

"Hopefully you will get a burst of energy soon since you work so many long hours." Alex spoke, and Olivia nodded as she moved over and sank down onto the sofa. Alex followed suit before smiling at her friend.

"Why are you smiling?" Olivia yawned loudly.

"Because I love being an aunt to Rory, and now I get to be one to this baby too." Alex smiled.

"I hope that bringing another baby into our family will really help Elliot feel like he can control his life. I know that before we completely stopped talking about his family, that he felt like he had no control over anything."

"Maybe, especially since he can control how you guys will be raising this baby and Rory. You two can make sure they are good people."

"Elliot is always really strong in his stance that Rory needs to respect women and treat them good. I'm thankful for that since my father was a piece of shit and so is Elliot's." Olivia sighed.

"Rory will be an amazing man when he's older. If not, we can all take turns teaching him how to act until it's pounded into his head." Alex chuckled.

"Alright, even if I love talking to you... I need to get some sleep. If you want to sleep over, you can either sleep on here or crash on Elliot's side of the bed. It's up to you."

"I have another load of laundry to finish then I'll crash. Sleep well, Liv."

"You too, Alex."

///

Elliot was so beyond excited that Olivia was pregnant with their second child, that he insisted in coming to as many appointments as possible. Most of the time he would drop Rory off with one of their friends for an hour, and then head to the hospital to join Olivia. Today's appointment wasn't any different.

"So, what are they going to be able to tell us today?" Elliot asked, as he held his wife's hand and waited for her name to be called.

"Today is the first appointment where we can see the baby." Olivia smiled, and Elliot's eyes lit up as he used his free hand and touched his wife's slightly swollen stomach. 

"I'm honestly so amazed by this all. And I'm so excited. I can't wait for the next twenty-five weeks to be over with so we can meet our amazing baby." Elliot grinned.

"I can't either. In the next five weeks or so we can find out the gender of the baby... if you want."

"I don't know. I was super excited to find out what Rory was the day he was born." Elliot smiled, and Olivia nodded as her name was called.

Elliot and Olivia went back to an ultrasound room. The tech talked them through the process, before having Olivia settle back. Olivia rolled up her shirt and laid back as Elliot grabbed a hold of her hand again.

"Is this your first baby? He seems pretty excited to see the baby." The tech chuckled, as she looked between Elliot and Olivia.

"We have a son, but he never got to come to these early appointments when the baby is still small and looks like an alien." Olivia grinned.

"Well, a lot of fathers are pretty amazed when they see their child for the first time. This appointment clearly will not be any different."

When the screen showed the baby and the baby's heartbeat was heard in the room, Elliot had a hard time staying strong. He was so happy that he and Olivia were having another baby and he loved their little one so much already.

But as he sat and watched the baby on the screen, Elliot was wondering if his father had been excited at any point during his mother's pregnancy with him. Or if he hated from the moment Bernie found out she was pregnant.

"El?" Olivia asked softly, and Elliot blinked a few times before looking at his wife.

"What?" Elliot asked.

"Do you want copies of the sonogram?" Olivia asked.

"Y-yeah..."

///

Olivia walked her husband outside to his truck before she had to go back inside and finish her shift. She was worried about Elliot because he had zoned out during most of her appointment.

"So, are you doing okay?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Elliot frowned.

"No, you aren't. Do you want to talk about it with me, or should I make you an appointment with our therapist?" Olivia asked. 

"Liv, please don't worry about me. You need to stay stressfree so our son, or daughter doesn't get sick." Elliot spoke, and Olivia sighed softly before nodding.

"Okay." She breathed. She leaned close and kissed her husband softly before stepping back.

"Liv-"

"I'm not going to force you. You know that I want too, but I'm supposed to give you space when you ask for it. So why don't you just go get Rory and I'm going back inside to finish my shift. I'll see you later tonight." Olivia sighed. She turned and started to head towards the hospital, but Elliot stopped her.

"I was thinking about when my mother found out she was pregnant with me. If she was excited about me at any point, and if my father was. Like, were they completely unhappy during the whole time my mother was pregnant with me... It's just so hard sometimes to wonder how I can be so excited about our kids, but how my parents could never be excited about me."