how to catch feelings

23

I couldn't help myself.

I ended up on Tik Tok, as I usually do, scrolling and scrolling and scrolling through the For You page until I found a video I thought would make Cole laugh.

To my delight, he sent back a laughing emoji almost immediately.

God, I just always had to overthink things, didn't I? Clearly everything was fine.

Absolutely no chill.

He sent a video, some guy dancing in a shrimp costume.

That was worth about three laughing emojis.

I returned to the For You page, only to get a Facebook message from Cole at the top of my screen.

"My favorite band liked my Tweet," he said.

"That's cool."

"Yeah. Except it was probably the stupidest thing I've ever Tweeted."

"Oh?"

He sent a screenshot, and immediately I busted out laughing.

It was a rehash of a meme, but one of those classics that is still funny the one millionth time you see it.

"I died the first time I saw that meme," I said. "TBH, I still die a little every time I think about it."

"Same, honestly."

I switched back to Tik Tok, met with another video of a cat.

Perfect.

I sent it to Cole.

"I love it," he said a moment later.

"IKR?"

I continued my scrolling, giving him time for a response before I put my phone up for the night.

No response, but I was fine with that.

I'd already gotten what I wanted.

***

"Maybe you guys should hang out some time," Damaris said.

I gave her a look.

"You could just like study in the library or something."

As if I studied.

"Or you could meet up for lunch at the café. Or at Starbucks."

"You seem awfully desperate."

"No, I'm just excited for you."

"Because I have a friend other than you? Gee, thanks."

She threw a mini Snickers at me. "You know what I mean."

"Maybe I do. Maybe I don't. Where's Meg?"

"She's on my side."

"Okay. Where is she?"

Damaris glanced at her watch. "Class."

"Lame."

"For sure." Without missing a beat, she asked, "You know what's even more lame?"

"What?"

"Your face."

"Ouch. I think I'm gonna go up to my room and cry. Good night." I stood up and collected my things from the coffee table.

"It's not even five."

"I know. Good night, rat." I made my way to the stairs, anticipating making a run for it.

Sure enough, the second my foot hit the first step, Damaris was right behind me, chasing me all the way upstairs.

It was still astounding to me that I had not once (knock on wood) tripped running up the stairs.

I made it up to my room, but it was too late to shut the door.

So I had to settle for the next best thing – jumping onto my bed and trying to hold her off with a stuffed dinosaur.

"Back off, or Scrumpy's gonna make you eat dirt!"

"Where's the dirt?"

"Over there. In the window." I gestured to the dozen pots I had sitting on my windowsill. "All that dirt. You're gonna eat it."

"What if I'm not hungry?"

"Too bad. Scrumpy doesn't care." With that said, I threw the dinosaur at her face.

She caught him.

Well, that backfired.

She tossed Scrumpy back. "You wanna go get breadsticks?"

"Sure."

*** ***