Anyone but You :: soonhoon

ABY :: 77

*jihoon*

"you sure you'll come? what if he ditched you? what if he's just fooling you? what ifㅡ"

"hyung, my decision is final. im going to that place he told me. and dont worry, ill be fine." i smiled to jeonghan hyung even though i know how fake my smile was. he shook his head probably seeing how fake my smile is. "i also want to talk to him. isnt this the best way, for the both of us?"

jeonghan hyung heave a sighed. "i dont know why you're still holding on, ji. he's clearly cheating on you yet you are here holding on and even making it up to him."

"i dont know either, hyung." i laughed but when i tried to, tears started to form in my eyes again. how im tired crying already. "as long as it didnt came from his mouth that he didnt want me in his life anymore, i'll still hold on. thats what i promised to myself when we became mine."

he shook his head and he wrapped his left arm around me, hugging me sideways. i leaned my head on his shoulder as i felt him caressing my left arm trying to comfort me. my tears already swelling up on my face. his comfort really makes me soft. he was literally, our mother, indeed.

"just call me or anyone of us if he ditched you, okay? we'll fetch you there."

i laughed. "im going to be fine hyung. im not a kid anymore."

"but your height is."

i harshly hit him in his stomach thats why he laughed. he teased me one more time before he bade his goodbyes to me since he still have something to do related to his studies and he just came here to console me when others cant because of their busy schedules. well seungkwan and minghao went to me yesterday and they even wanted to punch soonyoung right in the face.

knowing seungkwan, he could go berserk when it comes to us.

its been two days since that dance room incident. seokmin received a violation for hitting lina, good thing that seokmin has a strong connection to our college that they let him attend his schudules but he needs to report at the dean's for one whole week.

soonyoung and i arent really talking with each other after that. yes, weve seen each other almost everyday in the hallways or when ive got to go to the second floor for our subjects, but it wasnt the same anymore. i wanna know why he did changed. i wanna know why. i wanna fucking know why. im dying here every night thinking what did i do wrong to make him change like that. .

like he didnt know me. like he didnt love me. like i wasnt his boyfriend. like we werent together. like we didnt know each other.

i want to know the reason. i want to know where did i lacked that made us like this. i want to know why. i fucking really want to know why thats why i think that this would be the best way to talk about the matter going on between us.

if he dont want me anymore. . ill set him free. if he's not happy with me anymore, ill let him go. ill give him everything he want just to tell me why.

i was just staring into nothingness until i got interrupted by my phone's alarm indicating that i need to fix myself. its saturday today, and guess what? today is our third monthsarry, and since we are both not in a good terms, none of us greeted until now. im about to greet him earlier when he told the time and location but i would look fool if i did those first. so i just let it, im going to greet him later.

i took a quick shower then wore my versace sky blue polo with white tank top underneath tucked in my black skinny jeans and a pair of vans. i let my hair like that covering my forehead. i sprayed amount of channel perfume on my body then i grabbed my phone, wallet and even my unit's key with me.

when i went outside my unit, all of my friends are there even wonwoo who's holding a paper probably doing his plates. they are all staring at me worriedly and their brows synchronizingly arching.

"you can ditch him you know." wonwoo said shooking his head and pulled back his lenses thats already falling on his nose bridge.

"you're hurting yourself so much, hyung." seungkwan said and pouted as if he was really sad.

i gave them a smile. "ill be fine. whatever happens tonight, ill be fine."

"remember that we're always here for you, hyung." minghao said smiling.

i nodded and hugged them one by one. they all walked me to the highway until ive got myself a cab. jeonghan hyung and wonwoo tried to halt me from going to that place but i told them that im going to be fine. they let me anyways. i told to the driver the address of the location and let him drove me there.

the whole travel time, im trying to convince myself that we'll going to fix whatever is happening between us. that we'll get through this together. that he'll just doing it purposely and that he love me still. i tried to calm myself down and filled my head with optimistic even though there's still what if's ricocheting there inside of my head.

it took me more than twenty minutes to arrived there. i paid my fare and unload the car. i heave a sighed when i saw nothing but some kids playing. its a playground though. i sat at the nearest bench while waiting for soonyoung. i dont want him to know that i was here already, i want to see that he'll be here even though i didnt informed him.

i was staring at the kids playing, and running around the playground. they are all laughing and looking so happy. i wish i could be as happy as what they are right now. how i miss being a kid. no heartbreaks, no disappointments, no regrets, and no responsibilities to make. i wish i was still on their age so that i wont be suffering the heart break that im in right now.

i heave a sighed and fished out my phone to see the time and ohㅡim waiting for soonyoung almost thirty minutes now. he didnt even messaged me where he was right now. i rolled my eyes having a dillema whether i would text him or nah but i ended up typing. .

to hoshi: im already here, soons. where are you?

but after an hour of waiting. . he didnt replied. he didnt come.

i bit my lower lip trying to restrain myself. water started to filled both corners of my eyes. my heart is shrinking as my fingers are shaking already. its getting dark, yet he wasnt here. he didnt come. it was. . our third monthsarry. he promised me. he promised me that he'll make it up to me.

he promised me that no matter how busy he is, he would come and we'll celebrate this day together.

but where is he right now?

"ji?"

i jerked my head to the side as i saw namjoon standing there holding a paper bag in his right hand. i wipe my tears away while he walked closer to me.

he bend down to see me. "what are you doing here? alone?"

i shook my head. "n-nothing. just having some fresh air? yeah hahaha." and tears fall down again and again.

but he seems not convince that he even shook his head in disbelieve. he stood properly and i saw him getting a hanky on his pants pocket then he bend down again and he flexed his hand to my face. .

i stilled on my spot when he's the one who wipe the tears on my cheeks using the hanky he was holding. i hold my breath for a moment. he was about to wipe the other side of my cheeks when in a fast seconds, i just found namjoon on the ground, writhing.

"who the fuck are you to wipe my boyfriend's face huh?!"