The Collapsing One

Chapter 20

A Selfish Thought

Triggar warning

PTSD themes
Guilt
Pain and blood themes
Death themes

The world was dark. The rain clouds stayed, like memories you wanted to forget.
Alone in that empty house set Taehyung, alone.
He didn't know what he did wrong, hell he didn't know what he did right. Right now his world was spinning, falling into a pit of darkness, and worry, and most of all...guilt.

Jungkook woke up on the cold ground, still in his hiding spot. His body ached in pain, his arms bleeding madly along with his legs. It was like his body was thrown around over and over again. His heart was broken, he hated what he did, but he hated making Taehyung suffer even more. Seeing Taehyung hurting broke him, and he knew at this moment no matter how much he set Taehyung free, he knew he broke him in so many ways.
Jungkook knew his brother would be out on the search for him too, but unlike normal, he was gonna set Jimin free too. Selfish thinking, Is what it was, an idea of thinking without thinking about how it will effect others, not sparing a thought, or sparing too many thoughts on the subject.

Jungkook knew what he did, but he didn't let himself roll into the guilt that was already eating him alive. He had to move, because time was but the enemy.
He stood up, atleast he tried to, but he fell, hard, yet again. The pain he felt he had lost came rushing back causing him to groan in pain, flashes of that day hitting him like a bullet (Cliché right?). He closed the thoughts out, standing up again, the pain being so unbearable, but like before he found a way to keep going.
He walked in the morning darkness, the sun threatening to go up. He enjoyed mornings, they were quiet, and peaceful, he could hear the morning birds, see the wet grass, feel the cold morning breeze, he loved this.

He kept walking and walking, he had nowhere to go nor did he know where he was heading, yet he kept going. He had no home now, no family, nobody, a selfish thought took that away, a selfish thought.

Jungkook could feel his head getting light again, his legs felt like jelly, and his head began to spin around. The world around him felt like a merry-go-round, spinning....spinning....until nothing but the ground. Jungkook in seconds lifted himself up, the rest of his bandages beginning to fall off, blood beginning too flow and puddle. He got the looks of disgust, and the looks of fear, and the few kind souls who wanted to help, but Jungkook didn't let them.

He was in the middle of the big city, it was already starting to get busy. He was about to push any other helping person away, when the streets got filled, he was pushed around, thrown around and yet he kept going. He found a space, a small one. He sat down the pain making tears form into his eyes, he wanted it to be over, this pain....this darkness that was taking over him since the attack. He never fully processed the killing, wether it was the ones he killed or the many he saw get killed, they all were burned into his mind, each one of those lives gone, just like that.
The physical pain was still there, wether it be the bullet wound, or the many, many burns that were on his body, his arms most of all. It was too much for him, and he wanted it to be over.

The sky became bright, and the city became busy, the younger knew Taehyungs men would probably look for him, so he stood up again, a blood soaked ground being left behind.

Jungkook walked and walked, his legs felt like giving out so much, hours and hours of endless walking with endless pain, blood soaking his clothes, it felt like he was going to crash.

He took a few more steps before he collapsed hard, this time, there was no getting up.
His ears began to ring, he was about to let himself fall into the darkness Before a voice "Hey!" A women's voice spoke "Are you okay?" She asked getting into the youngers view, Jungkooks eyes widened for a second before they closed

"S-S-S.....Sooah....."

"Jungkook!? Hold on- just hold on"

-

how did she liVE?

✨GASP✨

HOW

Anyways
How are y'all
Doing good?
Eating well
Sleeping well
Drinking well

Again I'd like to apologize for my lack in updates, it's been quite crazy lately!

We got snow :)