The Collapsing One

Chapter 38

Darkened Rage

"Burning"

"I'm burning"

"I'm dying"

"I'm losing my mind....I'm losing it without you"

"Mr Kim Sir..." a voice spoke up "what?" Taehyung replied coldly "Y-You asked for these..." her voice shook as she handed the elder a pack of cigarettes and a lighter "Mm...Thanks" he spoke "Now go"

He sighed, pulling out a cigarette lighting it.
He took a puff before putting the hot cigarette on his skin "Am I hurting like you did that day Jungkook?" Taehyung asked "You know I keep hoping that maybe- just maybe if I harm myself enough I will" He spoke, his eyes welling with tears that quickly fell "Maybe...I'd I just hurt enough...I'll feel your pain....How much did you hurt? How much did that pain you felt break you" Taehyung spoke before he let out a sad broken sob.

"I want to be with you again...I've thought about leaving so many times...but every time I get close I hear your voice telling me not to...somehow even though your not here by my side it's like I can still hear you....it's fucking torture" He sobbed "I hate hearing you- I want to hear you- I want to see you...hold you...I want to see your bunny smile, and fluff your brown hair with your perfect eyes...I want that...I want you..." he sobbed, beginning to shake.

"I lost our ring..." he spoke "the last thing I had from you was gone..." he sobbed "That's when...I burned the place down..." he spoke "I burned our home....just to feel better...but it just made it worse- I went from losing one thing to losing everything...." He sobbed "I lost everything- everything is gone- ALL OF IT!" He yelled, pulling out the lighter pulling his arm over, burning his arm, old and new scars filled his arm.

(Never self harm! Life has a strange way of getting better- it may suck and be torture but you can use that pain to fight to live)

He stood up grabbing his jacket.
He walked outside, leaning on the wall, smoking cigarettes. Once he was done he flipped the finished cigarette to the ground.

He walked around for awhile. He hated everything now, the sites he once found beautiful were now nothing.

He pulled out his phone, photos of the burned mafia building making him remember the day he burned it

"No- NONONO!" Taehyung yelled as he threw things around "FUCK!" He sobbed, throwing everything "T-Taehyung-"

"WHAT!?" The elder yelled "What's wrong?" One of the men asked "My wedding ring- find it!" He yelled "NOW!"

They searched for hours....but nothing.
Every nook, every cranny...nothing.
Taehyung stood up, his entire body language was cold, and so angry.
"Get everyone out, and give me containers of gasoline" He spoke watching as his men went wide eyed "Did I stutter?" He asked and the men gulped "Will do" One spoke before running out.

Taehyung sighed as he stared at the two huge containers of gasoline.
He grabbed one of the containers, pouring it everywhere.
He grabbed all of Jungkooks stuff, his photos, everything of him, and tossed it into the gasoline filled floor.
His tears fell madly as he did so, but he closed his eyes grabbing the other can and dumping it on the rest of the house before he lit a cigarette, tossing it in the fire.
He stood for a minute, wanting to let the flame engulf him.
But he was grabbed by his men, and pulled out of the house.

They all left that day, the building in flames behind them.

"I lost it all..." he gulped "All over my rage...and it still didn't help" he spoke letting out a quiet cry.
He kept walking and walking, he just wanted to leave his old life behind, he wanted to give up.
He wanted to jump off a bridge...yet he wanted to be better- a better boss- a better person.
But he couldn't- he felt like there was something off, a part of him was missing...
Something...something was off and he couldn't quite put his finger on it...

His heart...was broken....but little did he know...it was broken because of a lie....a terrible lie...

-

Y'all
How are you
Eating well
Sleeping well
Drinking well
Mentally okay?