NURTURING US

Chapter 12

Shehnaaz was trying to hug Sidharth and ask for forgiveness but he wasn’t letting her touch him.
“Shehnaaz, Pehle breakfast kar, Phir Baat karte hai..”
She agreed and sat to eat while Sidharth called Adith in and they all had a silent breakfast. Once done, Adith asked, “Ghar jana hai ya yehi reh rahe ho aaj?”
Sidharth looked at Shehnaaz for a second and Said, “Ghar niklenge ek do ghante me… Adith nodded in agreement and left.
Shehnaaz held Sidharth’s arm and cupped his face with another hand, “Sidharth, mujhe maaf kar de, please. Maine Jaan bujh ke nai kiya kuch bhi. Aise mat naraz ho ja mere se. Please.”
“Meko kaam hai, Mai conference room me hu. Tere sir me Dard Hai, ye dawal le aur so ja..” he said very coldly. Sidharth’s anger was justified because the news headline along with the video could have gone viral if he wouldn’t have taken care and also the men drooling over her was making him upset too.
“Laundo ke sath dance karne ke time pe nai sorry feel hua. Han?” he said clenching his teeth and held Shehnaaz’s arm tightly, “Chup kyu ho? Itna pass aane diya tumne. Yehi mai karta to? Seh leti? Hurt hoke baith jati. Mere muh na lag Shehnaaz. Mera dimag alag level pe sadha hai. Agar ghar jana hai to abhi chali ja. Mai rok nai raha tujhe yaha” He said again, very coldly. Shehnaaz had realised her mistake properly but his anger, his cold behavior was killing her from inside. He wasn’t shouting at her. But the way he was saying was pinching her heart with every word.
She couldn’t even cry about it. She was wrong and Sidharth’s behaviour was justified. She walked back to her room when he left her finally. He didn’t realise that his hold was way too tight, she realised about her sounded feet and he looked back to see her once and the view broke his heart.
He quickly came back inside and held her in his arms. She clenched her fingers into his t-shirt and started sobbing.
“I am sorry Sidharth. Mai janti hu meri galti badi hai is baar. Mai sachi bata rahi hu, 2 drinks ke baad Humne juice order karna start kar diya tha. Kuch order exchange hua tha aur galti se hamara juice usne kisi aur ko de diya aur kisi aur ki drinks humko dedi. Mai blame nai kar rahi hu unlogo ko. Lekin Sidharth, mai wada karti hu agli Baar har cheez ka dhyan rakhungi. Please aise gussa mat ho. Already kal ke heavy shoot ke baad mera dil baitha Jaa raha hai. Please Sidharth.”
He didn’t realise when he sat on the bed, wrapping his arms around her. He couldn’t see her in pain. The way he was fighting with himself, making himself choose between taking care of her or being angry with her so that she takes care the next time. He was confused within himself.
She continued sobbing and his heart ached. His heart took over his mind and he pulled her closer, crushing her in his arms. She cried harder as she felt her emptiness been filled with his love again.
He rubbed her back, “Bas bas. Maaf kiya. Rona band karde. Please.” His voice had love and concern and he wasn’t being cold and upset. She felt a sudden wave of peace inside her heart as he spoke to her with love.
She was clung to him and her face was dug into his neck. He could feel her warm breath on his skin and he closed his eyes. In sometime he could listen to soft snores and understood that she had slept.
He made her lay comfortably on the bed and cleaned her wound again. He applied a cream and wrapped it with a bandage and lay next to her again.
He then called Adith saying they will be spending the weekend at their little space and asked to drop the bag of their used clothes home and get their fresh clothes for the coming weekend. He agreed and finished his work while Sidharth made Shehnaaz rest her head on his chest.
As he looked at her, he saw the dried tears on her face and his heart ached again.
“Kyu nai dekh pata tujhe aise. Kyu karti hai aise. Kyu nai rakhti apna dhyan.” He said but she was fast asleep  because of the effect of the medication.
He held her close to his heart. “Dekh, nai reh paya tujhse gussa.” He murmured again and she unknowingly dug her face deeper into his chest, her one arm resting on his heart.
He held her hand and pressed his lips on it and kept it back on his heart. He fell asleep too as he was flooded with multiple emotions.
Adith got food and clothes as asked by Sidharth and he was chilling in the garden area of the entrance scrolling through his phone.
Shehnaaz woke up first and lifted her head up from his chest to look at him. As he felt her moving he woke up with a jerk and his grip around her tightened, “Kya hua?” he asked her in his half sleepy voice.
“Kuch nai. So ja tu..” she said patting his head softly and he fell asleep again. She wore her glasses so that her head doesn’t pain..
She made tea on the induction and sipped it while sitting next to Sidharth, caressing his hair. He turned towards her and rested his head on her hand.. She kissed his forehead and smiled.
Her eyes were puffy because of the crying and she was waiting for him to wake up. He did get up in an hour and snuggled into her, forgetting about everything for a while he just crushed her under his weight, as if he was punishing him for being careless but with love.
That’s the beauty of a relationship if you care so much for your partner that you get upset when they themselves don’t care about them. For you, more than your anger your partner’s betterment, your partners safety is more important. You can’t see them in pain. Your angers flushes off seeing them in pain.
He got out of bed and looked at her, his intense eyes were stuck to her. She felt shiver ran down her spine as she tried looking at her but couldn’t look at him for long..
“Pass me Aa.” Said Sidharth and she obeyed but looked away from him.
“Sidharth, I am so sorry. Mai dubara kabhi aise careless nai rahungi, I promise.” She said as he cupped her face in his large palm.
He shushed her by taking her lips in his. He wanted to be with her and so she did she herself.
He hugged her close and rubbed her back as she kept apologizing back to back.
“Acha bas bas ab.. Itna sorry mat bol.. Pair dikha apna…” he said as he pulled out of the hug and took her foot in his hand. She closed her eyes as she felt pain.
“Bhuk lagi hai?” he asked and she nodded. He wnet out and saw Adith who had kept the food on the conference room’s table and he was on his phone. He looked up and saw them coming together, “Ho Gaya patch up!” He blurted out making Sidharth blush.
They ate and Sidharth took her back to the room for a serious talk.
He sat next to her on the bed and made her look up into his eyes.
“Aise sir jhuka ke mat baith galti hui, thik hai. Hota Hai. Mujhe janna hai kaun tha order lene wala sala jisne galat order liya.”
“Sidharth abhi dusro ko chor. Mere se Baat kar.” She was getting restless this time and it was visible.
“Shehnaaz, relax mai bhot important Baat karna hai. Chor diya sabko. Sun ab meri Baat.”
“Ha, mai Sun rahi hu. Bas tu gussa mat ho jana.”
“Ha Meri Jaan. Teri fikar thi isliye gussa hua na. Agar tujhe kuch ho jata to? Please Shehnaaz, shoot ki negativity to hamare beech nai aane dena hai ye samjh. Abhi aise kafi scenes shoot hone hai. Hum personal life me nai lad sakte na aise.”
She nodded in agreement, her eyes had guilt in them and Sidharth was making her understand things.
“Shehnaaz, aise muh chota mat kar. Mai samjh raha hu  tu sachi sorry feel kar rahi hai.. Bas kar ab please.. Mai nai hu naraaz.. Will you please smile now?”
She couldn’t smile. She was upset with herself. She thought to herself, “Mai aise kaise kar sakti hu.”
Sidharth understood her a lot and he knew what was she thinking. He held her in his arms and made her sit on his lap.
He tucked her hair behind her ear and traced her cheeks with his thumb. “Bas karegi sochna ab? Weekend mila hai Hume, aise sadh ke time spend karna hai ya ache se pyar karna hai? Hota Hai Aisa. Life experiences se sikh, mayus nai ho ja. Please Baby.”
Ah! He finally called her with a nickname and not just Shehnaaz all the time. Though she loved when he called her with her name but the nicknames were special for her too.
Her lips curved into a smile listening to Baby in his voice and she threw herself at him and he wrapped his arms around her, comforting her. He was impressed with himself at the way he handled the situation without shouting at her.
“Mai bada ho gaya finally.” He said and she looked at him and hit she couldn’t help but laugh!
He smiled looking at her laughing and the time went smoothly.. Now what? TBC!