Forbidden Love [Loki x reader] (Part 1)

Chapter 31 - soft heart

— your POV —

I wake up in a room that looks like a hospital. I look down at me and I realise that I'm connected to some devices. I rip them off of me and get up, but as soon as I do that Steve comes into the room and looks at me.

-Y/n: "Where am I?"
-Steve: "At the compound, don't worry."
-Y/n: "What happened?"
-Steve: "You don't remember?"
-Y/n: "I wouldn't ask if I could."
-Steve: "Wait here.", he turned around and was just about to close the door again, "please."

He knew I would go, but something made me stay after he said ‚please'. I sit down on the bed because I felt dizzy. Shortly afterwards the door got opened again and a doctor, just as Tony, Steve, Natasha and Thor came inside.

-Doctor: "What is the last thing you can remember?", he sat down in front of me.
-Y/n: "I tricked them. I didn't want to fight against you. I stopped the manipulation and ran over to you, that's it. What happened? Where do you keep them? I need to talk with them."
-Natasha: "They wished to not see you.", she talked over Tony.
-Y/n: "How did you win?"
-Natasha: "We.. knocked them out and when we thought that we won, Ares got conscious and threw a dagger at you."
-Y/n: "But I don't have a wound, I already checked."
-Steve: "Loki pushed you away. He-", he stopped to talk.
-Y/n: "Is he alright?"
-Thor: "He is in a coma."
-Y/n: "Can I see him?"

They look at the doctor and as he nods they brought me to Loki. I should've changed my clothes because I'm still wearing the dress of the fight and it's Full of blood.

-Y/n: "Can we have a moment alone?", I ask as we stand in front of the door.

They nod and I step into the room. I could hear that they started talking as soon as I closed the door, but I don't care, there are way more important things right now. I sit on the chair beside his bed. It's so weird to see him like this.

-Y/n: "Thank you Loki. I don't remember what you did for me but they told me. Do you know what an idiot you are?"

I lay my hand onto his and suddenly I feel like my memories come back. As if my mind intentionally forget what happened and if someone is pulling them out of the edge it was hiding in. I pull my hand away from his.

-Y/n: "If you'd excuse me for a moment."

I walk out of his room and as soon as they saw me they got completely quiet.

-Natasha: "Are you alright."
-Y/n: "Yes, i mean I killed my siblings and Loki is in a coma just because of me. It couldn't be better."
-Steve: "You can remember?", I simply nod.
-Natasha: "I'm sorry I didn't want to lie to you."
-Y/n: "It's alright, you didn't want me to freak out."
-Tony: "How are you feeling?"
-Y/n: "Good. I go take a shower and change my clothes. Don't wait for me."

I go away from them but I can hear a silent ‚you have to tell her' from Natasha. I don't want to know it, to be honest, that's why I keep waking to my dorm. When I arrived there I took, as said, a shower and changed my clothes into something I thought I would never want to wear voluntary.

At least I could wear a black sweatpants. I'm not confident with the rest but I also don't care at the Moment. On my way back to Loki I had to stop at his room. I don't know why I probably want to grab one of his books to read them to him or something, so I enter.

I look around and head straight to the bookshelf in his room. I look for a book that would also be interesting for myself but I haven't really found anything. Then I notice that there is a book on his desk and I walk over to it. As I come closer I see written paper laying there. It looks like Loki wrote it himself. His handwriting is so beautiful, so elegant. I couldn't help myself so I started to read:

She is both,
hellfire and holy water.
And the flavour you taste
depends on how you
treat her.

Is he writing about me? I lift the paper up and see another one laying under it. I also start to read this one:

She wears strength and darkness equally well, the girl has always been half goddess, half hell.

This is beautiful, but I really hope this is not about me. I would break his soft heart.  I lay them back, grab the book and leave his dorm. I entered his room and sit beside Loki.

-Y/n: "Alright, this is definitely weird but because you're an idiot you now have to listen to me reading to you.", I start to read to him:

Love.
Death.
Ghosts.
The world was drenched in blood.... Hell's own child was coming for her. Implacable, unstoppable, a creature fueled by madness and rage, that had maimed and murdered and would kill again....
(From the Book ‚Crimson Peak: The official movie novelization')

I read a lot because the book is awesome. It is exciting, frightening and romantic at the same time. I never thought I would be into stuff like this, but I barely can stop reading it. Someone then knocked at the door and I let them in.

-Steve: "Are you alright? You've been in here for quite a while.", he sits in the couch on the other side of Loki's bed.
-Y/n: "Yeah I'm alright.", I lay the book down and look at Loki.
-Steve: "I know it's not the Right timing but we're still mad that you left with all that chaos and we would like to hear your site of the story. It is necessary because it's about a contract that we have to sign."
-Y/n: "I don't want to leave him. I can't do this to him after what he has done for me."
-Steve: "And if I tell them to come here? Would it be okay for you."
-Y/n: "I guess."
-Steve: "Alright, be Right back."

He leaves the room and instead of continuing to read I just stare at Loki.