UPSTEAD ONE SHOT(S)

Late Realisation

Gist: Instead of Hailey going off with Adam in 6x2 and Jay going to his father's apartment alone, I've done it so Hailey goes with Jay. (Here's your warning OneChicagoHolly😂)

Jay's POV

I couldn't face going into my father's aparment alone. Especially with the history him and I had, and the last conversation I had with him; a one-sided yelling competition. I couldn't understand how I was ment to greive in a sane way, for someone who was embarrassed of their own child. Part of me still loved my father- he was my father after all- but the majority of me was dumb from the guilt I carried. The shame of making one of my parents embarrassed, and the pain he caused me as a child.

I still had to go in though.

After the conversation Hailey and I had in the ambulance, I asked her if she'd come with me to my father's apartment. I felt weird asking, but I knew Hailey wouldn't think too much into it. It was Hailey after all. Being the amazing partner and friend she was, she said yes and drove us straight there.
I was shaking the entire way to the apartment and all the way to the door, adrenaline thrashing around inside me. "You don't have to do this now, if you're not ready" Hailey said, watching as I struggled to steady the keys in my shaking hands. "No, I need too" I replied, still fighting the shakes. "Atleast let me open the door, so we aren't here all evening" Hailey chuckled, opening her hand out for the keys. "That's a more polite way, than the way you asked me before" I teased, handing the keys over to her. "Funny" Hailey stated, opening up the door for us both.

Inside, coldness hit me like a bus. Not the kinda cold that you can warm up from by putting on a coat, though. It was the type of coldness that you get when awful memories come flooding back, memories you tried so hard to forget. Arguments, beer bottles going flying, and comments that Dad gave me that I couldn't ever forget. "Hey, you good?" Hailey asked, pulling me out my daze. "Yeh, I'm okay" I nodded, wandering off into his bedroom. It was practically bare, other than the furniture the room held. I went over to the nightstand/vanity mirror, and opened up on the of the draws. What I found was a shock. There was pictures of me at my graduation, a picture of me and a little boy that I saved when I was on patrol, and a letter I written to him when I was on tour. All of it clearly had been looked over many times; due to the worn tares on the corners of some of the items.

My father wasn't embarrassed of me.

He made me think he was for so many hellish years, even when in hospital breathing his last breaths, but he wasn't. Deep inside him he was proud, it was obvious. Why did he act like I was the most useless person alive? It made no sense. Unable to keep the build up together now I the real truth dawned on me, tears tickled down my face and muffled sounds of crying escaped- my hand not enough to block the sound.

Hailey's POV

I stayed in the living area, letting Jay have time alone to look through his fathers things. He'd been in the room around ten minutes, when I heard small sounds of crying coming from behind the closed door. I waited a few seconds to see if it would soon stop, but it didn't. Hedging my bet of overstepping the boundaries, I headed to the bedroom and opened up the door.

The second I opened the door, I saw Jay leaning against the vanity mirror in floods of tears. It was heart breaking to see him in such a state. I could tell he was trying his best to contain the tears, but the tears were stronger than he was then. Taking a deep breath, I walked over to him and placed a supportive hand on his back. I could fully see his face through the reflection of the mirror; his eyes were bright red, his face even more red, his cheeks puffed with him trying to be as quiet as possible. "Let it out" I whispered, placing my spare hand on his shoulder. And he did, he let it all out. His next move shocked me, but I wasn't complaining about it.

He turned around and wrapped his arms around my neck- crying into my shoulder. Unable to support us both, I slowly sunk to the ground, keeping him close to me the entire time. We just sat and I held him in my arms, as he let the build up out. I was devastated, but also so happy that he was comfortable enough to be able to be vulnerable around me. "I got you" I assured him, squeezing his arm tighter. "H...he didn't hate me- Hailey" Jay sobbed. "What?" I asked quietly, confused to Jay's sudden change of thought. "He wasn't embarrassed. Look at the pictures on the dresser" Jay said, pulling himself away from my brace. Taking his order, I made my way to the dresser and picked up three items- all of them having Jay in it. A picture of his graduation Jay, a picture of Patrolman Jay and a little boy  and a letter Jay written. All of them had clearly been kept with pride. "Oh, Jay" I sighed, unable to even comprehend how confused Jay must feel. "Why did he have to be like that?" Jay asked, sounding so defeated. "I don't know, Jay. Father's have weird ways of doing things. As hard as it is, we just gotta make some kinda peace with it" I answered, often asking myself that same question about my dad. "How?" He asked again, looking at me- his eyes begging for a helpful reply. "It takes time, and it'll kill you, but it will happen" I assured him, well, as much as I could in such a terrible situation. "Yeh, I guess" Jay sniffed, the tears coming to a halt. "Come here" I opened my arms, gesturing for a hug. "Thankyou" Jay sighed, wrapping me into him. "Ofcourse, that's what partners are for" I replied. "Yeh".