𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡

namjoon

there is no cure.

there will never be a cure.

you can't bring back the dead. you just can't.

he's figured this out already. he's done his calculations. he's done everything you could possibly think of.

he even tried making one. what happened was death. death or turning.

he hasn't told jungkook this. the man has gone through enough already and someone had to be the "tough" one.

not that jungkook wasn't strong, but mentally, he isn't here.

"you have to eat jungkook. you'll get weak." he attempted to give the frozen boy potted meat.

"at least drink something." he handed him the bottle of water, jungkook not even giving him a glance.

"what's the point? they're gone..." jungkook mumbled.

"you can't beat yourself up like this. this isn't healthy-"

"what the fuck is the point?! if it's just going to be like this.... people i love dying because of fucking zombies.... then i don't want to eat or drink or do anything. i would rather sit and rot." a tear rolled down his cheek.

namjoon sighed and sat down, wanting to comfort the man. he understood him. hell, the people he loved were gone. but, he had his breakdown. he went through it and he understands it now.

this is the new world. a world with the same spiraling concept.

every day going by slow, the nights going by fast.

your family dying, bleeding out in front of you while the only thing you could do is watch and sob.

starving, surviving, and fighting.

meeting strangers that may have good intentions, but coming across the risk meeting strangers that plan on killing you and taking whatever you have.

no, it wasn't a new world.

it was the same old world from before.

just now, there are flesh eating monsters to top it all off.

"they wouldn't want to see you like this, jeon. they would want to see you survive."

he scoffed sadly, "how do you know? how would you know what i'm going through?"

namjoon shook his head and leaned back on his palms, "i had to watch my sister sacrifice herself to save me. i had to listen to my dad's blood hurling screams as those creatures ate him to the very bone. my mom.... she was the last one. i thought she would survive with me. me and her... i can't even speak about what those bastards did to her."

it took him a while to get used to living without his family, without his anchors. he thought he would never get over it, but somehow he did. and now, he would help jungkook get over it too.

he was weak, as weak as he's ever been before. namjoon didn't want to ever get back to that point in his life ever again. ever since they died, he's become stronger, more resilient.

there was silence after hearing namjoon's story, jungkook understanding a new side to the man.

namjoon found jungkook on the side of the road, dragging bodies and screaming help.

he hurried to him, shushed him, and assured that the bodies he was dragging were dead. he helped him and brought him inside an old, abandoned shelter, attempting to rebuild a strong man he knew was inside him.

"i'm sorry." jungkook apologized.

"don't be. it's not your fault. i think about them every day, but that's the thing jeon. that makes me want to keep going. it makes me want to survive. for them."

"how? how will i ever be that strong?"

"you are, trust me. you just have to believe you are."

jungkook sniffed, "how are you this strong? how do you manage to carry yourself knowing you're all alone?"

"oh, i don't think i'm strong. i just try, that's all. tell yourself you've made it. just try."

jungkook nodded, "i'll try."

"and that's all i ask."

namjoon was never the type to show his emotions. never the type to show the class his stressed out expressions or his watery eyes.

never the type to tell someone how he really felt or if he felt uncomfortable.

he was the type of person that brushed aside rude remarks. that ignored anger and annoyance pushed onto him. that helped others calm down and think rationally.

he tried to stay strong. he wanted to stay strong.

he wasn't the best at giving advice or wisdom. but, he tried.

he tried and that's all that mattered.

**

short but important <3