are we meant to be?

part 69

i forgot how much i love waking up like this. being held close to josh's chest as his hair dangles in my face and he quietly snores. it's weird. when he's awake all he does is talk. never shuts his mouth. while he's sleeping he talks a little too. but he always sleeps with his mouth open. why do i notice that? i'm not sure but i just do. i lay there for almost an hour just listening to the soft sounds of him snoring while watching his chest slowly move up and down as he breathes. i'm ever so gently tracing josh's chiseled jawline when his eyes flutter open and he shoots me a soft smile. 

josh: morning babe

his voice is groggy and tired. he pecks my lips and grips onto me tighter.

josh: why you awake so early?

i shrug. it's only 10:02 and i've been up for a while so. 10 is pretty early for josh.

josh: so. can i hear your song?
you: josh-
josh: i don't wanna start off our relationship with fighting. i just wanna hear your song
you: it's not that i don't want you to hear it- i just think you'll misinterpret it. i started singing when you told me we should take more than a break.
josh: so it's about me?
you: that's what i mean. part of it is. NOT ALL OF IT. most of the song was just lyrics jaden helped me come up with as like filler lyrics. only the chorus is about you. i promise
josh: are the rest of the lyrics-
you: it's stuff about jadens previous relationships because i needed help writing more. so most of the song is not even about you. just the chorus
josh: can i hear it?

i hesitantly grab my phone and press play. i set it next to me and rest my head back on josh's chest. after the song finishes-

josh: ok which part is about me?

he doesn't remember?

you: whenever you broke up with me i was trying to tell you we could make things work. your exact words were "if you love me let me go"
josh: ohh
you: the only lyrics about you are- it'll just make more sense if i sing them.

"Oh, oh, my dear
Don't love me out of fear
If you love me, let me go
If you love me, let me go
Oh, my darling
Please save yourself from hurting
If you love me, let me go
If you love me, let me go"

you: that's all that's about you. i promise
josh: i believe you

my body fills with relief.

josh: you have an amazing voice

i smile a little.

josh: i just added something g else to our future

i laugh.

you: and what would that be?
josh: your probably gonna sing the kids to sleep with your beautiful voice

i laugh and roll my eyes.

you: i should probably be getting back. he lets me stand up

i try- and fail. josh just laughs at me.

josh: i'm that good *laughs
you: you wish

i laugh and he gets up helping me up. he ended up having to drive me home.

josh: so jaden got that whole thing on video today. would you care if i posted it on youtube? i don't have to if your not okay with-
you: i don't care josh *laughs

he smiles. then he carries me up 2 flights of stairs and into my apartment where charli is on the couch eating chicken nuggets.

charli: hey love birdsssss
you: how'd you know
charli: bryce's loud mouth said you guys fucked for hours last night.

josh smirks.

charli: and by the looks of it- you enjoyed it

josh sets me on the couch.

josh: see ya
you: bye

he kisses my head and walks over yanking on charlis hair.

josh: bye
charli: ow! idiot

josh laughs and leaves. charli looks at me smiling.

you: what? *laughs
charli: you- you just seem so happy. you've been dating less than 24 hours
you: i'm just a happy person

we both try to hold straight faces before bursting out laughing.

charli: ya right

we laugh.

charli: but for real though. your more happy now than you've been in the past few months combined
you: ok shutup. i need a nap. help me upstairs?

she does. once i'm in my bed i take a long nap. how does life go from being hell one day to being amazing the next?

................