Chapter 29
The color of death
Random things aren't unsystematic like we do expect. What is happening to a person's life is affecting someone, and that someone affect other's too, and that other's affect another. Isn't it like a family tree? Or a domino effect? Or Solving a mystery case?
Our life is connected to one another. You may affect someone's life. Or Someone may affect your life.
And that's what happening right now. Alexander's being with me for the past few days since Shabina's burial started. Hindi siya nawala sa tabi ko.
He has a few shirts in here and garments for daily living, that's why he doesn't need to go home. Through day and night, twilight and afterglow, he's here, trying to talk to me, but I can't even lift a muscle on my face to talk, I don't know. Everything seems mundane, everything seems so tiring to think.
Laying on my bed, I'm watching him taste the coffee he made on the kitchen, given that the door of my room left swung open. I can recognize his shirt, that's what he wore the other day as he washed his clothes from yesterday.
I remained on my position, watching his every trivial actions. I can see the marked of being exhausted on his face, the lack of sleeps and pale skin, his sunset's eyes that once intimidating, now painted with undeniable sadness.
His tradition of cleanliness and neatness is now thrown out of the window, as his shirt looks like a crumpled paper. His three days unshaved stuble can be visible even from afar, his hair is disheveled, even his three days unwashed jeans.
Sadly...I'm affecting his life too.
Marahil naramdaman ang aking titig dahil napasulyap siya sa aking direksyon. Tumaas ang kaniyang dalawang kilay bago tumigil sa ginagawa.
He remained looking at me, or perhaps staring. I didn't let go. I just lay there, like a lifeless leaf, staring at him as I fall slowly. As seconds past I saw how he published a façade joy on his eyes and face. A small smile, I used to see these past few days.
Alexander wasn't aware every time he does that...I hate it.
Umiwas ako ng tingin bago tuluyang tumayo na mula sa kama. The dress I am wearing yesterday still on me. The black dress, like how my life yesterday mirrors today. Just black no white. Just Darkness no light.
My bare feet kissed the cold floor of the Apartment, as the morning sun hit this part of the sphere, with smell of coffee playing on my nostrils, nostalgia hits me...
Sa bukana ng kusina ay hindi ko maiwasan na matigilan. Alexander's voice slowly faded as the memory on me heightens. The hologram of Shabina walking around the kitchen as she prepares for our breakfast, with her messy hair while scratching her belly and morning stories as if we've separated for years.
"Marah? Hey,"
Nagising mula sa aking malalim na iniisip ay bumaling ako sa kausap. Namataan ko kung paano dapuan ng lungkot ang pilit niyang ngiti.
"I made you a coffee," aniya ng maupo ako. "Here,"
Naupo siya sa aking harap at siyang paglagay niya ng pinalamanang tinapay sa aking plato, may nakahanda din na corned beef at sinangag.
Nanatili akong nakatitig sa kaniya, pinapanood ang kaniyang bawat kilos. Dahilan upang agad siyang matigillan matapos magpalaman ng corned beef.
"Marah you need breakfast—"
"Shabina needs me," I blurted out mindlessly.
Napayuko ay madiin kong pinaglaban ang aking mga daliri. Iyon ang mga salitang umiikot sa aking isipan simula nang pagkagising.
BINABASA MO ANG
The Endgame and Mischief
Teen FictionGrieved for the spoken words, Mourn for the memories on hold, Tears like a domesticated fall How could I remain the desire for so long? You lay down the rules, put down the knight and pawn, We played chess, I never thought, I was playing with death...
