Tricked (t.m.r.)

1.37 - Crack-up

I knew from the moment when I accused Thomas of being a spy that he won't forgive me easily. It was difficult to even get close to him and apologize without him briskly walking away from me. I didn't know what to do; I mean I could corner him and force him to listen to what I have to say but I don't want to make Thomas feel pressured at the same time. After all, it wasn't easy being a greenie and trying to make yourself comfortable with your new life.

Ben was dead for sure, I wasn't able to keep to my word to help save him. All that was left of him the next morning was the bloodied collar that was around his neck when he was pushed into the maze. Chuck seemed to be the only hopeful glader Ben would survive aside from me, and he looked ready to bawl when he saw the evidence that was left at our door step. Ben didn't make it through the night. I hope when he went, he went without much agony. Newt and Minho weren't surprised at his fate, much to my dismay.

Going into the maze without Ben feels... foreign, and coming back to the glade without Ben was too bizarre of a concept for me to take in. I don't think I'll ever get used to Ben's missing presence. 

The grief was enough to make me collapse in front of the doors, and I laid there motionless until I felt the wind of the closing stone walls. I don't know why I still bothered to wait up for Ben, we had concrete evidence that he wasn't coming back. 

When the sky was replaced by a shade of dark purple, Newt had ever so kindly picked me off the ground as though I weight nothing and escort me to the Map Room personally, saying the quicker I get my job done, the earlier I can get some rest. If it wasn't for him, I would have spent the night asleep on the grass instead. 

He handed me his bottle of water from his satchel when he realised mine had run out. There was about half a bottle left and I gulped all of it down to satisfy my parchness. I had run out of water about two hours before I came back, and was glad Newt was here with his.

I let my smile fall as Newt turned on his heels and left the runner's hut, sighing and looking up at the sky before pushing the door open to allow myself in. No one greeted me as I entered and I was left quietly sitting at my own corner, munching the sandwich that was supposed to be my lunch as I drew the map. I forced myself to turn my head back to my paper to concentrate each time I caught my eyes flickered over to Ben's empty spot, exerting more force onto the paper as I blink back my tears.

"There's a left turn here." Minho peers at my paper before using his finger to point out my mistake. I sighed before taking hold of an eraser and erase my mistake before continuing drawing, unaware that Minho was still supervising me.

"You're supposed to turn right and go straight here." Minho points out again. I squint at the paper as I frown. I'm pretty sure there wasn't the route I've run today. I caught Minho laughing from the corner of my eye and immediately flared up. Here I am trying my best to fit in a runner's job and there he is laughing at the stupid prank he pulled on me.

I put my pen down and pinched the bridge of my nose, making the rest of the runner look over curiously.

"Out." I pointed at the door, trying to stay as calm and collected as possible. When no one moved I started shouting, "Out! I said get out! I want all of you to get out of the Map Room right now except Minho! I don't give a shuck if you haven't finished your drawings! GET OUT! OUT!"

Minho was the only one who didn't flinch at my sudden outburst. Hell, he wasn't even fazed by it. The other runners grabbed their papers and pencil and ran out of the Map Room, probably going to sketch their routes outside or at Frypan's kitchen. Just when I was about to walk over and shut the door, the last runner came scurrying in and grab his shoes, making me gave him a confused look. He grins awkwardly before turning around to leave.