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Undisclosed Secrets

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Undisclosed Secrets
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Author :: ViniShah2

Reviewer :: gukkeun

First Impression :: 13/20

» Cover :: 7/10
It's nothing special; pretty simple. But its simplicity is what makes it stand out. For a simple plot like yours, it's very much suitable. Not to mention the aesthetic is pleasing to the eye. But do make some adjustments. The subtitles aren't visible at all. Either enlarge the words or shift it to a darker area. The white would contrast well and the wordings may be seen easier. The fonts could be altered as well.

» Title :: 5/5
What more can I say? It describes the story perfectly. There's nothing more to be said.

» Blurb :: 1/5
I do have to say how distasteful it is. Nothing about the blurb is intriguing, or in the very least, had something to look forward to. The narrative synopsis suits the theme really well, but do make it more interesting. Be specific. How could the "prize of trusting people blindly" impact her life? You could add fillers even by inserting Ana's background and career. A good idea would be ending it off with a cliffhanger; an unsuspecting twist to the blurb itself. Wouldn't that be more exciting? Imagine being swelled with curiosity just from the blurb!

Beginning of a new start :: 5/10

The beginning was a bit of a cliché. Almost every book begins with the MC struggling to get out of bed. It would be nice to see some creativity to greet readers at the start. But, your writing style definitely makes up for it. It wasn't anything special, decent on my part, but definitely better than most books I've seen. The grammar as well. It wasn't perfect, but the proofreading was fairly well done. You gave me a strong first impression in terms of style for the entrance.

Usually, character introductions made in the middle of the story would piss me off. However, I just loved how smoothly you inserted them in. They don't interrupt the story. In fact, they helped in skipping a few parts of the redundancy, which I dare say was genius. Nevertheless, I don't prefer the way you listed out bits of their personality. That's something we would rather find out on our own while being absorbed in the story.

The storyline I managed to grasp onto for the first few chapters seemed to be the secret James was hiding. That literally was it. It went on for four chapters straight. The rest of the content was the introduction of the MC's persona, Ana. But keep note that her character was introduced in a boring manner. I lost interest four chapters in. The only information I seemed to be getting was red flags from Austin and an overprotective big brother. There was no movement in the plot. Fasten the pace, add some sort of a mysterious aura to it. A code that needed cracking that would last until the climax of the story. For now, I dare say the invitation to read further isn't whipping up an interest.

Concept and plot :: 17/25

A lot of fillers at the beginning of the story. A huge amount of them. Some scenes were unnecessary; redundant, should I add. The pace was too slow, nothing had me quivering in excitement of what's to come next. The intimate scenes between the protagonists were cute, but that's just it. They were of course, very much realistic. But there's no point if the story didn't have a twist that made up for the fillers and bland unneeded scenes.