┌────────═━┈┈━═────────┐ Seesaw Review Shop Season 2.0 └────────═━┈┈━═────────┘
The right place to get honest and constructive feedback on your books whenever you want it. Everyone is welcome and we really hope...
The title was not relevant to the story. When you google the word 'Filter', many meanings pop up at once and there were 2-3 meanings that were somewhat relevant, not entirely. Please find a title which matches the overall plot of the story. The current title looks taken from Jimin's solo song 'Filter'. It gives the story a plain and boring look when in fact, it's not.
The blurb was packed with the right facts. It contained the initial baseline of the story without revealing too much information nor too less. It was perfect and intrigued me to further read the book.
The cover needs a lot of work. I will start off by saying to please remove that Netflix sign on the top. It doesn't make the cover look appealing or aesthetic, it does the opposite actually. The pictures of the characters - Jimin and Jungkook - look very messy. For one, why is Jimin's face hidden? There are double roles of Jimin so if one is hidden, the other must be present. There should be two figures of Jimin added. About Jungkook, he's shown as a positive character in the story so why is this photo of him chosen? He doesn't look like a playboy and rather looks like the supposed monster the blurb states. The effects and font look amazing but please choose a dark background for the cover, white does not suit at all.
Beginning of a new start :: 8.5/10
The onset chapters were wavering. The opening was nice but as it moved forward, the mystery of Jimin having double roles was revealed very early. I admit I was hella confused when in the first chapter Ayusha left the cafe after bidding the supposed Jimin goodbye and then later he asked himself "who is this Jimin", I was like, um what? I would've appreciated it if you'd kept it that way because as soon as I read the 2nd and 3rd chapter, I instantly got to know about Jimin's double role. Other than that, the chapters were all intriguing.
Concept & Plot :: 20/25
The concept wasn't something new but was unique. It wasn't new because I've read many stalker fics containing BTS members so that particular fact didn't interest me. However, the unique aspect was the double role of Jimin as well as having another male protagonist, Jungkook. Another unique aspect is the female protagonist, her bitchy personality and vamp like behaviour which is completely different from the goody two shoes female leads we see in most of the fanfics.
The plot was moderate. I felt like I was reading a regular book with not many complex dialogues & scenes. The story contained precise scenes, not overexaggerated or unnecessary ones. All the male leads got equal amount of time with the female lead. Overall, good execution of plot.
Characters & Emotions :: 10/15
Whenever I read a story, I focus more on the character build-up and their sentiments. Your way of portraying the characters' feelings was plain. There was no complexity of emotions portrayed so far in the story. I've only read 6-7 chapters and till then, I couldn't emotionally connect myself with the characters. Absolute no built up of emotions. The only sentiments I saw were Jungkook's and Jimin's feelings towards the female lead. There were no individual sentiments of a character. I could only detect the attitude of the characters example Ayusha's sassy and bold attitude, Jungkook's cheeky and playful side while Jimin was completely mysterious. Sometimes, I even felt as if there was only one Jimin, but with multiple personalities because the name 'JM' doesn't add up. It is the initials to the name Jimin which made me think so. Inshort, that's a mystery that is doing well in building up the plot very well.
About the characters, as I mentioned before, they all had opppsite personalities to each other which is a good thing. Ayusha, despite being the female lead, had a bold, fierce, bitchy and strong personality which made her stand out the most. Jungkook was a playboy, cheeky and a character with a big heart while Jimin was mysterious and intimidating. Basically, everyone were contradicted to each other which definitely makes me curious on how they will get along or fall in love. Apart from that, I got to witness many different characters, some partially hidden example JM's friend V while some existed but had no precise personalities to them. Also known as side characters. Overall, it was a good balance.
Tone & Style :: 9/10
Your writing style was good. Very well depicted paragraphs and precise descriptions without unnecessary input. The length of the paragraphs were ideal too, not too long nor too short, just the right amount of sentences. However, the dialogues seemed a bit bland. I'd love to see usage of some spicy/complex words that would make the readers go "oooh".
The toning of the story was good. It wasn't fast paced nor slow. But as I had mentioned above, the mystery of Jimin having a double role was revealed too soon which faltered my reading pace a little. Other than that, the transition from one scene to another was sleek which kept the flow of the story sleek without any disruptions.
Grammar :: 17/20
Your grammar was top-notch. However, there were many silly mistakes located like wrong formation of sentences, tense inconsistency, misplaced articles, and wrong action and verbal tags. These mistakes were seen in very few places but it was there in each chapter. Absence of colons and semi-colons was also detected. But the overall execution was marvellous which made me ignore these mistakes sometimes. Still, I'd suggest you to find and edit those mistakes for a better flow while reading the story.
I hope my judgement was fair enough. :)
TOTAL :: 77.5/100.
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