Without You (gxg)

Part 52- Present Day

It feel surreal, applying for a marriage license with Noelle. We wanted to get it to be able to get married that Friday. I had taken off of work- I told Tessa that Noelle had a Doctor's appointment- but that was a lie.
We were going to get married.
And it felt truly real after we got our marriage license.
On Thursday night, the night before we got married, after Noelle and I had dinner, she sat down on the couch and was looking at something on her laptop with what seemed to be a lot of interest.
"What you're looking at seems to have interested you." I said, joining her on the couch.
"I want to know what you think." she said, "I am really thinking about going back to school for nursing. They have accelerated programs where you can get your BSN in a year if you already have a degree. And there are three alone that I see right in Philly."
"If you want to do that, I fully support you." I said, "How long have you been thinking about a Nursing program?"
"Honestly since I was in the hospital. I just felt like I could see myself doing it. You know...the one nice-ish thing I can ever remember my mom saying to me was that she thought I should follow her footsteps in becoming a nurse. That she thought I would be good at it." Noelle said.
"Well, I think it's a great idea. And I do agree with her- you would be a wonderful nurse." I said.
"In terms of money...I know we wouldn't just able to live off what you make. I don't want you to worry about that- I still have some money saved from when my mom passed away." Noelle said, "I will use that toward rent and bills."
"Why do you think she left that money to you?" I asked Noelle, "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."
Noelle looked down for a moment and then looked at me, "Part of me thinks it was her way of saying sorry to me. But that could be wishful thinking."
The rest of the night Noelle and I looked at nursing programs for her to apply for. And this time I also wasn't dreading her going to school.
And then the next morning I woke up- and Noelle and I were going to be getting married. It felt like an ordinary morning in March- but I was going to be ending it a married woman.
I felt a bit guilty for not telling anyone I was going this. But it felt right. It felt right that Noelle and I were going to be having this moment for ourselves. And in the state of Pennsylvania you don't need a witness to get married- so it would truly be our moment together.
"What are you going to wear?" Noelle called out to me from the kitchen, where she was making coffee.
"I'll show you when I get changed. I want it to at least be a little bit of a surprise." I called back.
I had gotten a dress online- and I had been able to open it without Noelle seeing. I told her it was hair supplies when she saw the box and she didn't question it.
It was white and came in at the waist. The sleeves were three quarters length and fully made of lace. It wasn't something I would usually wear, of course, but it was for my wedding day.
I decided I was going to curl my hair, and make it look very full and with a lot of body. As for makeup, I was going to go very light and pretty. A light pinky-nude lip, long lashes. As I did my makeup at my vanity in the bedroom, Noelle got changed in our second bedroom. For a moment I wanted my mom to be there- to do my hair and my makeup. But I knew she would be happy for me- and she would be able to do my makeup for whatever small party we had to celebrate.
Oh god. How would I even break to my family and friends we just got married?
Breathe. You're doing this.
"Hey, not to rush you. Are you almost ready? We should probably get down to courthouse before it gets too crowded." Noelle called out to me.
"Yes! Just let me set my makeup." I said, and sprayed my face with setting spray. Then I took a deep breath and walked out of the bedroom, hoping my dress looked okay on me. I paired it with some white flats.
I saw Noelle do a double take when she saw me. And I was sure I did the same when I saw her. She had on a white button down tucked into slim fitting black dress pants and a black blazer. She looked sexy as hell. And I wanted to rip her clothes off rather than go get married in that moment.
"Wow. I'm so happy you're going to be my wife." Noelle said, "You look absolutely stunning."
"So do you." I walked toward her. She put her arms around my waist, and I looked at her, "And I'm beyond happy you're going to be my wife."
Being in her arms in that moment settled my anxieties I was having that morning about getting married today. This was right. I just knew it was.
"Let's go get married." Noelle smiled at me.
As we drove over to the courthouse down in Philly, we played music and just held hands while I drove. Noelle was going to be able to start driving again in a few months. I knew she couldn't wait to. The most she got out was for physical therapy- but she had been taking walks each day, trying to keep herself busy.
There were a few couples in front of us at the court house- we had arrived pretty early in the day. We walked in and showed our ID's. Then we waited for our number to show up on the screen so we could be let into the room where they preformed the "ceremonies."
"Want to get something for lunch after this? We should go somewhere nice." Noelle said to me. She was fidgeting her leg. I could tell she was slightly nervous.
"That sounds great." I said.
A drink would be nice. To calm the nerves.
But I knew I couldn't do that- for Noelle. And I was more than fine with that.
Our number showed up on the screen. It was time.
We looked at each other, and Noelle took my hand. Then we walked back to the small room where we would be getting married. A female judge who looked to be in her 50's stood behind a small desk and smiled at us.
"Here to get married?" she said.
"You know it." Noelle said, and I could tell she was nervous.
We stood in front of the judge, facing each other. Eyes locked on each other.
The judge made it short and sweet.
"Do you, Noelle Thompson, take Harley Edwin to be your wife- from this day forward. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness, in health- to love and to cherish?" the judge said.
Noelle looked at me, "I do."
I felt my body get a jolt of energy. Like the first time I ever saw her.
"And do you, Harley Edwin, take Noelle Thompson to be your wife- from this day forward. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness, in health- to love and to cherish?" the judge said.
There's no turning back now. But why would I ever want to in a million years? I love Noelle more than anything in this world.
"I do." I said, smiling at Noelle.
"I now pronounce you married. You may kiss the bride. Both of you!" the judge said happily.
Noelle leaned in and kissed me softly. And I felt every tip of my body get chills. This wasn't my girlfriend- or my fiancé that I was kissing anymore. This was my wife.
We're actually married.
As Noelle and I walked out of the courthouse we held hands. "We're married!" she said happily, "I can't believe it."
We chose a very fancy vegan restaurant to try. We figured we would try something different.
Even though it was afternoon, the restaurant was dimly lit and had a nice ambience. I couldn't help but look at her from across the table. And just like the first time I ever saw her- senior year first period- I thought she was absolutely beautiful.
From me being beyond nervous to asking her to partner up for a project- to our first ever hangout with me knowing I liked her- to us dating and me knowing I loved her- to her going of to college- to us being separated then for years- and then with everything we went through after she got back- we now were married. And to know that we got here- and were now going to be together forever-
I'd do it all over again.