Always Okay | (Adopted By Elizabeth Olsen)

Chapter 8

Word Count: 4535

Alexis's POV

Today was the day we were going to get my hair cut. Lizzie had scheduled it with one of her friends, Clayton, ahead of time so that I had plenty of time to prepare. I was not fond of getting my hair cut but it was incredibly long and I think the last time I got it cut was after Josh decided to stop coloring it because it was getting overly expensive. I think they also cut off some at the hospital because as the doctors have described a "biohazard." I'm guessing that meant it was most likely covered in blood but I didn't want to think about that.

I've been up since two AM when I woke up struggling to breathe and now several hours later I'm still awake laying in bed watching the ceiling. I didn't want to get up but I also couldn't wait for Lizzie to come to get me. I glanced over at the clock next to me on the nightstand and to see to read-only 7:23 AM. I groan internally rolling over in the bed, Lizzie usually comes in by now. Where is she? She didn't leave me, right? She wouldn't do that. Well not again, right?

I threw back the lilac covers and sat up in the best taking in the dimly lit room. There was a nightlight in the corner that lit up the room. I know it's childish to be so old and have a nightlight, but Lizzie put it in here and it honestly kind of makes me feel better that I'm not sleeping in the pitch black. That's what it was like to sleep in my room at Josh's, there was rarely any light during the night, which made my nightmares a lot worse. I had a much harder time trying to decipher where my nightmares ended and reality began. But I guess looking back at it now, there wasn't much of a difference between the two. Both were nightmares in their own sense.

Soon enough I began to hear footsteps outside my door, so I quickly laid back down and closed my eyes as if I was asleep. "Alexis? It's morning. It's time to wake up," a gentle voice said softly as I felt the bed dip. I rolled over slowly as I opened my eyes to see Lizzie. "Good morning Lex, how'd you sleep?"

"Okay," I mumbled to keep up the act.

"Just okay?" Lizzie asked moving to sit fully on the end of my bed.

"Yeah," I nod stretching my arms out and sitting up.

"Well, I made breakfast, pancakes, and eggs. After breakfast we'll leave for Clay's, okay?" Lizzie said studying my face.

"Sounds good," I agree hoping the bags on my face aren't too noticeable.

"Alright, I left some clothes out on your desk, just come out whenever you're ready," Lizzie said getting off the bed and walking out closing the door behind her.

Great now that that awkward encounter is over I can finally get up. Things have been a bit weird these past two days, I can tell she wants to talk about our visit to the house, so I've been avoiding her. I mean I've spent the past seven years being told to put my tears away, to be quiet, and that there's no reason to be angry or upset. I'm not one who opens up and I don't really want to relive the past, I do that enough in my dreams. Each night I barely get a few hours of sleep before waking up in tears followed by several short breaths. I haven't told Lizzie about my nightmares purely for the same reason I don't want to talk about my past - I'm scared of how she'll react. Her nature has been so similar to the way things started with Josh, so how can I be sure she'll be different?

Pushing away those thoughts, I fling back the covers and jump out of the bed before grabbing the clothes off my desk and heading toward the bathroom. I change quickly and do my business before washing my hands and pulling my hair back into a low ponytail. Lizzie told me yesterday that Clayton, or Clay I guess, will most likely wash my hair there so no need to take a shower.

I met Lizzie in the kitchen as she sets two plates at the table. We both eat in uncomfortable silence. Lizzie tries to ask me a few questions but I shrug them off trying to keep a cap on my untrustworthy past. I can't help but feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, where Lizzie will become mean and aggressive like Josh. When will she begin yelling at me and forcing me behind a locked door?  When will I have to start wearing the same set of clothes every week?  I know we went online shopping a few days ago since the clothes we picked up from Josh were 'too old and worn' as Lizzie put it.