Always Okay | (Adopted By Elizabeth Olsen)

Chapter 35

*TW: Mentions of Eating Disorder Tendencies*

Word Count: 4543

Alexis's POV

"What's going on babe? What are you thinking about in that pretty little mind of yours?"

"Oh-um nothing," I answered trying to clear my throat and wash away my growing fear. What is Mary-Kate was secretly sent her to shop e off? I thought Lizzie was coming? Does she not love me anymore? Did I push her too hard, what is wrong with me that I can't get my emotions in control?

"Don't you lie," Aunt MK snapped causing me to look up at her briefly in the dimly lit car?

"It's nothing," I whined not wanting to talk about this.

"Alexis, I know you're hurting and in turn, that means Lizzie is hurting," Aunt MK explained to me. Why would Lizzie be hurting? She didn't spend seven years trapped with Josh. Her mother didn't overdose when she was a toddler. She didn't grow up alone and confused.

"I'm fine," I replied through gritted teeth. It's always back to Lizzie, isn't it?

"Why if I break it down then?" Aunt MK continued not letting this go, if there's one thing these Olsens have in common it's their stubbornness. I swear once they get an idea in their head, that's their full focus. "Are you really not hungry? Or is there something else stopping you from eating?"

I glance at her quickly and can tell by the expression just how serious she is about this, but I don't want to tell her. She'll get mad at me then everything will just get worse. I purse my lips together trying to keep my focus on the back of the seat in front of me instead of talking to her. I don't want to make it worse. I don't know how I feel or what to do about it. I'm just so confused, even by my own actions. It's like I don't even know myself.

"Alexis, if you don't want to tell me you don't have to but I think it would help if you said something even if it's just no," Aunt MK added sweetly since I was refusing to even look at her.

I look over at her sitting on the opposite side of the car, her facial features seemed to relax once her eyes met mine. "I don't think I can," I muttered. I hope she didn't hear me but I knew she did when she frowned slightly.

"Can I tell you something then?" Aunt MK asked and I nodded waiting for her to continue. "When I was younger, I struggled a lot with my mental health," she started slowly. "When I was about seventeen, I started to feel like everything was going downhill like there was no way out. It was like trying to breathe underwater," she continued. My mind flashed back to the time I did try to breathe underwater. I thought I was gonna die at that moment, everything felt heavy and it was difficult to even try to breathe normally.

"Everything was overwhelming to me, I don't know exactly how it started but I started omitting certain foods from my diet as a way to deal with all the comments I was receiving in my career. And I'm nowhere near proud of this...but it somehow made me feel better. Things got out of hand from there and when I passed out in the middle of a board meeting, I was lucky. I was lucky because your Aunt Ashley was there to pull me out and help me get the help I needed."

I watched her carefully thinking back on her story if she was seventeen-ish then I was probably just born. That seems like forever ago, but even in the dimly lit car, I could see the small tears slip out of the corners of her eyes. It might be forever ago but it's definitely still hurting her. I felt my own tears burn in my eyes as I tried my best to just focus on the story, but it was making sense in my mind. I know what it feels like to try breathing underwater both literally and figuratively.