Always Okay | (Adopted By Elizabeth Olsen)

Chapter 15

Word Count: 3262

Alexis's POV

The week continued to drag on painfully. Each day started pretty early as we went to meetings and press junkets. I hated being with her, well more specifically I hated what being with her meant. There were always people screaming at us and the people with cameras would get so close to us, it was terrifying. It always ended up with me balling into Lizzie's shirt while the rest of her friends watched awkwardly. I hated being so vulnerable in front of so many people but I couldn't help but be terrified of the crowds. And the afternoons only continued to worsen the days with my countless doctor appointments. I am glad to say that my stitches were taken out yesterday and now I only have a small bandage on my arm until it scars over. 

One good thing that came from being with Lizzie has been getting to hang out with Scarlett. Anytime she has a break, she always comes to spend time with me and I really like it. She's easy to talk to, not as intimidating as Lizzie. Whenever I talk to Lizzie, I'm always worried about what she thinks of me and if I'm living up to the amazing little girl she always gushes about. I'm scared that if she knows too much, she'll know the real me and I won't be enough. Scarlett never knew little me so she has nothing to compare it to. We talk about books, food, movies, and everything in between. She doesn't push me to talk about Josh but if the topic comes up she waits for me to decide if I want to tell her. I like that. I don't mind Lizzie asking me questions because I'm sure she's curious but I like that Scarlett just gives me space. She's very patient with me and waits for me to formulate my words carefully. She told me that she does the same, which is why she stutters or often repeats the same phrase. It makes me feel less alone. 

Right now I'm currently waiting for Lizzie to come 'wake me up but it seems like she's running late. Today is Saturday and she told me that we are going to the beach, which I am reluctant to go to because I don't like going outside. I'm not used to being outdoors, there's always so much noise. I haven't slept in Lizzie's bed since Monday, because I don't want her to get annoyed with my constant tossing and turning. I've been better and much quieter when I wake up from nightmares, no more screaming - I can't make that mistake again. I felt safe with Lizzie but at the same time, I'm terrified of her growing sick of me and shipping me off or throwing me in a basement somewhere. It's happened before so who's to say it won't happen again, even though she promises I'm not sure how much I can trust those words. 

I hear footsteps in the hallway and I quickly pull the sheets up in anticipation. Lizzie knocks before swinging the door open, "Good morning, sleepyhead!" she cheers as I feel the end of the bed dips as usual. 

"Morning," I huff out as I look over at her. 

"How'd you sleep?" she asked studying my face. 

"Good," I replied quickly hoping my face doesn't reflect the lack of sleep I've been getting. I woke before this sun came up today and have been staring at the ceiling ever since. 

She hesitates slightly staring me down, before moving on, "are you excited for a day at the beach?" 

"Yeah," I say trying to muster but a cheery voice but it sounds more nervous than I intended. 

"I think Scarlett and Clay might join us if that's okay?" Lizzie adds while still watching me closely. 

"Okay," I nod knowing it'll be nice to spend time with both. 

"Alright why don't you get dressed and join me in the kitchen for some breakfast?" she decides before getting off the bed to let me get ready. I nod in response and wait for her to leave before getting out of bed. We picked out my clothes yesterday together, which is still a new thing to me but I enjoyed learning about it.