Every Second There Is Love

Chapter Thirty One ~ I Miss You

Chapter Thirty One ~ I Miss You

If one day, you'll wake up to a morning, remembering the past, my love won't change for you at all. If I have to wait for another few years to be with you, I'll wait. I'll love you even if you do or don't remember me. During the past month of waiting for you to wake up, I've been thinking to myself. You're love for me has always been true. Every second there's love, my heart never stopped beating for you. Every time I hold your hands, I'm nervous you'll wake up. Yes, I do want you to hurry and wake up but yet I'm nervous to face you. I don't know how to start, there's so many things I have to be sorry for, so much to be thankful for, and so much to ask you.
Luhan.. your last words to me before the surgery was, "....I know I got close to you originally was to help him, but during this process, I really fell for you. I'm sorry I lied to you."
I don't blame you for helping Lay.. I'm impressed that for someone you love, you're willing to do anything, even if it hurts. Is this the love you have for me? When you broke up with me, it was for Lay but was it also for us? You didn't want to hurt us any further, right? Or is it only for Lay?
"Yah.. (YourName)," Lay whispered as he tapped me on the shoulders and continued on with his sentence, "Can I have a word or two with you? There's a lot I need to confess to you."
I got up, Luhan's eyes seemed to focus on the flowers more than me. He sighed as I turned my head away from him. Do I make him nervous? Do I creep him out? I closed the door quietly as Lay and I exited the room.
"I confess, I like you. You captured my eyes and my soul. I don't know how but the first time Luhan gave you his jacket to keep you warm? It was the first day of school. I stood at my locker and noticed you there then noticed Luhan. Luhan is very nice and heart warming person. He'll give his jacket to anyone who he sees cold. He'll run to buy coffee for someone who was in the streets on a cold day. He's the type to go buy ice cream for someone who was in the streets on a hot day. I thought it was a great opportunity for me because I'm always the shy one. I planned that you two will be friends and he'll introduce me to you one day. But over you, we had our fights and our unpleasant times. It was silly when, from the beginning, his love for you was more than my love for you. He always looks after me and it was silly of me to start a fight over you when he already offered you to me. He gave me information about you the moment he finds out, he'll tell me you're schedule of the day. He did everything for me even when he, himself fell for you. A month ago when the accident happened, I saw how worried you were for him. It made me realize how much you fell for him as well. There was never a competition because he won from the beginning. The day you confessed to everyone that you lied, I was sick. Luhan came running home to tell me in person instead of calling me. He said, 'She lied, she has no illness, is she really the one for you Lay? She's not the one for you. For popularity, for friends, for love, she's willing to do anything. If you two are together and she feels that you don't love her enough, is it alright for her to make you jealous of her by flirting with other guys?' I knew he wanted to hate you so much but he hesitated so much when he told me, his eyes avoided mine, he couldn't stay still or calm. For a second I thought, why does it bother him that you lied? Then I realized way later, that he fell for you. No matter what happened, what you did, his love for you only increased. The time when he broke up with you, I originally thought it was for me, because we had a fight just the night before, but it was because of how hurt he was. If I supported the two of you when you dated, he wouldn't have so much to worry about when he was with you. He would have only thought of you when he hugs you. You'll be his only thought when he's with you, but instead I was somewhere in every thought of his, making him hesitate to take your hands or hug you. No matter how much he hated you for lying, he loves you. Don't forget that. Someone showed me a video of when he got shot and stabbed. Before he got shot, I saw how much he worried for you. He came right to you to protect you. When they left, he turned to you, hoping you were fine when they didn't even touch you. Even after he broke up with you, he worried so much about you. He cares for you even after he found out you lied. That's about all I have to say, don't lose hope in him because he never gave up on you. Maybe he lost some of his memories but he still has his heart. He's still that kind-hearted person. He'll help anyone in need, I've seen you struggling with your books before class, I'm sure he'll help you when he goes back to school. That way, you two will be friends again, right? Maybe you two won't have the same classes anymore because he has to catch back up on all he has forgotten in lower classes, but you'll see him around school. I promise. If I can help, please give me a call. I want to do you two a favor." Lay expresses his feelings.
He takes a step closer to the room Luhan was in and takes a deep breathe. He turns back to look at me. "Ah I almost forgot to tell you. The person who stabbed and shot Luhan was Brandon. Yes Nancy's brother. He went to jail. He confessed that he hated you so he wanted to ruin the person who you loved. He thought it was unfair for you to lie to Nancy, making her go through so much pain. He said it was revenge. Although he's in jail, he promised to make sure you and Luhan will never be together because of that one lie you told.." Lay added.
After a pause, Lay continued, "If Luhan can forgive you, then I can forgive you also."
It was all about that lie again.. that one lie. Why did I even think of it? I regret so much! I can't be happy anymore, I can't be fine with it. Yes, maybe it helped Nancy be more mature but it caused Luhan to get shot and stabbed, it caused Brandon to seek for revenge, it caused my heart to regret. There's more to be upset with than happy about the lie. I'm actually really scared of Brandon, I'm scared of what he'll do to make sure Luhan and I won't be together. After knowing that he has a gun and the guts to go kill people, I'm really scared. Maybe he's in jail but his friends might do anything for him. I've learned for people who are really close friends with someone, that they are considered their brothers, can and would do anything for one another. If Brandon had that close of a friend or "brother", then most likely, Luhan and I are in danger. Most important is Luhan. Second most important is his family. MeiHan might be in danger if they find out that she's Luhan's cousin.. I'll prove to Luhan that I'll do anything for him. Whether if being a hero is the guy's job, I'll still do so. I can't sit there and wait till something bad happens before doing something. If anything happens to MeiHan, Luhan will be worried. I can't let that happen.
One lie can change someone's whole world upside down. One lie can ruin someone's whole life. That's what I've learned. I know words are very powerful but I didn't know it was that powerful to be able to ruin someone's life. I know people will take words to mind but not always to heart. If I have mistaken these people as mindless and heartless people, then I am wrong to have done so. Maybe afterall, it's not a new start.
I stand by the half opened door and stare into the room to see Luhan lying on the bed. I whisper, "I'm sorry to cause you so much trouble. It won't be over anytime soon, please hang in there with me Luhan. I really miss your embrace, your touch, your heart warming words to me. I wonder if you miss me too. Anyways.. you're right, if it wasn't for my lie, we would have still been together. One day or two more days would be fine, if I can be held in your arms one more time, I'll feel like there's nothing to worry about anymore. If only... "

...To Be Continued~~~

Thank you so much for reading~ Like always I'll thank you! I really mean each thank you. I feel so encouraged to write especially when I see that some of you vote for the chapter ! Thank you so much ~ It's been a week since I last posted, I'm sorry for such a long wait !