|| second installment of "habit series" ||
Solari Dominguez has a habit of biting her fingernails, especially at the times that she's nervous or guilty. It was a normal mannerism for everyone, not until Justine Klein Olivarez kissed her one day when...
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“Love . . .” I called him.
“Hmm . . .”
“Help me get up.”
Klein helped me sit from lying on the bed. I tried to open my eyes but my vision is blurry. Nasaan ba ang salamin ko?!
“Lasing na lasing ka,” he said. “Sana uminom ka lang hanggang sa kaya mo.”
Umiling ako nang umiling. “I enjoyed it!” I laughed before wrapping my arms on his nape. “I missed you.” I kissed him on his lips but he didn’t respond. “I miss you. Why are you here?”
He smiled. “You told me to come to you if I’m feeling better.”
Mabilis akong napangiti. “Are you feeling better?” He nodded. “Yehey!”
He chuckled. I kissed him again but he’s still not responding. Sumimangot ako.
“Why aren’t you kissing me?”
He smiled a little. “Saka na lang kapag hindi ka na lasing.”
Muli akong sumimangot. “Hindi ako lasing. Kiss me back . . .”
Umiling siya. “I’ll kiss you all you want when you’re finally sober.”
Hinampas ko siya kasabay ng pag-agos ng mga luha ko. “You made me wait for almost two weeks and now you can’t even kiss me! Hindi mo na ba ako love?!”
“Mahal na mahal.”
Umiling ako nang umiling. “You don’t love me! You don’t even want to kiss me now!”
He chuckled as he pinched both my cheeks. “You’re cute.”
I shook my head. “No! I want you to kiss me. I missed you!”
He laughed before planting a soft kiss on my lips. “I missed you like crazy too, love, but I can’t do anything right now. You’re drunk.”
“I’m not!” I cried.
“You are.” He chuckled.
“Hindi mo na ako love!”
He laughed once again. “Kung p’wede nga lang, matagal na kitang pinakasalan.” Tumawa siya nang mahina bago bumulong. “I don’t think you’ll remember everything tomorrow but I hope you do. You’re really cute.”
Hinampas ko ulit siya saka umiyak nang umiyak. “Hindi mo alam kung gaano kasakit yung nararamdaman ko kapag . . . kapag hindi ka nagpaparamdam nang gano’n!”
I sobbed. “Lagi na lang akong nag-iisip. Lagi na lang akong nag-aalala. Nandito ako palagi para sa ‘yo pero hindi ko maiwasang . . . isipin na baka bigla kang mawala kapag hinayaan lang kita.”
Klein’s face became serious. I can see it clearly even though I’m not wearing my eyeglasses.
“Natatakot ako kapag iniisip ko na nagagawa mo akong tiisin. Na . . . nagagawa mong mabuhay sa araw-araw nang kaya mong hindi ako naririnig o nakakausap. Natatakot ako, Klein, kasi hindi gano’n yung nararamdaman ko. I miss you everyday. I want to see or hear you. I want to come to you but I respect the boundaries between us and the time that you need for yourself. I respect all of that!”
