Zedaph: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?
Xisuma: The car takes a screenshot.
Doc: For the last time X, get the fuck out.
Cleo: *Walking in to a room* Sorry I'm late... I was... doing things.
BDubs: *Running in behind her* SHE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS-
Etho: Time for plan G.
Mumbo: Don't you mean plan B?
Etho: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.
Stress : What about plan D?
Etho: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.
XB: What about plan E?
Etho: I'm hoping not to use it. Scar dies in plan E.
Grian: I like plan E.
Keralis: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?
Gem: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies
Pearl: Socks are Feetie Heaties
Tango: Forks are Stabby Grabbies
Impulse: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties
Hypno: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies
Cleo: Stamps are Lickie Stickies
Joe, annoyed: And you're all disappointments
TFC: Well, well, well... if it isn't my old friend: the dawning realization that I fucked up bad.
Hels: I'm sick and tired of being called 'mortal' like, you don't know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet. Stop making assumptions. It's rude.
EX: If Hels and I were drowning, who would you save?
BadTimes: You two can't swim?
EX: It's a hypothetical question! Who would you save?
BadTimes: my time and effort.
Cub: If you bite it and you die, it's poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it's venomous.
False: What if it bites me and it dies!?
Jevin: Then you're poisonous. Jesus Christ, False, learn to listen.
Iskall: What if it bites itself and I die?
Beef: That's voodoo.
Wels: What if it bites me and someone else dies?
False: That's correlation, not causation.
Iskall: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?
Beef: That's kinky.
Cub: Oh my God.
YOU ARE READING
Hermitcraft Season 9 Oneshots
FanfictionNew season, new book, and hopefully this will be longer than my S8 one! I can't wait to write about and make art for the new Season, and hopefully you'll enjoy reading this too! <3
