THE CELESTIAL AND THE COMPANY *A Hobbit fanfic*

Chapter 29; Seeking answers

*Author's note*

Okay here is where we finally get off the tracks of the events of the Hobbit and into Hela's own journey, plus the AT LONG LAST physical appearance of her/our beloved Marchwarden of Lorien, Haldir.

Warnings: grieving, death, mentions of SMUT, angst, some fluff, and more angst.

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Three months. Three months to the day since the Battle of Erebor and even though my strength has fully returned to me, my connection to my sibling's Celestial powers still have not yet returned. Also I've been feeling this severed connection with my own powers. My hands that I could once make glow with my own Celestial magic had faded away shortly after the battle I had with Bolg on Ravenhill.

And there was this—festering emptiness inside of me. An emptiness that couldn't be filled even with the love I was given by Bard and the children, or even the people of Dale. I tried to seek council with Girion in the spirit world but even that ability I could no longer do. I needed to seek out answers, and there's no one here who can help me with that.

So one early spring morning, I snuck pass the guards and found Icarus waiting for me to take me to the place I knew where I would find answers, Lothlorien.

"Did you really think you could slip pass by me unnoticed?" Bard's voice spooked me. Icarus raised himself defensively, trying to intimidate Bard but I stroked his chest easing him in Elvish. I turned to Bard and said to him.

"I thought you needed the rest? Especially after the months we've had. Now that Dale's been cleansed of the corpses, I'd figured you'd wish to stay in bed." Bard crossed his hands over his chest and changed the subject back to me.

"All right Hela, what's really going on?"

"What's what going on?" I asked him innocently. He shook his head softly.

"Don't think I haven't noticed you staring off into the distance with a longing look in your eye. I see you've regained your full strength back but there's something that still troubles you. So what's going on?"

"I'm fine." I assured him softly. But one raised brow and his face looking at me with an 'I don't believe you' look made me break. "Okay." I surrendered as I walked up to him. I sighed heavily through my nose before confessing "Look," Bard gave me his full attention. "Yes I have regained my physical strength back, but—not mentally. And at first I thought it was because of my grief over Fili and Kili but now I've realized it's......"

"Because you still don't have your powers." Bard finished for me.

"Maybe." I said solemnly. "I don't know I...." I fiddled with my gauntlets before sighing again to look at Bard. "Aye, is that vain of me to say?" Bard shook his head. "It's just there's this festering emptiness and now I've completely lost connection of my own Celestial powers. I can't even talk to the spirits who've passed anymore!"

I felt myself going on a rant so I stopped, breathed and gathered my thoughts together.

"So I plan to go to Lothlorien, to see the Lady Galadriel. She may have the answers that I'm seeking and....." I fiddled with Haldir's engagement bracelet as I finally confessed to Bard. "Also there's someone there that—I've finally decided to give an answer to."

I took off the bracelet and held it out to him for him to see it shine in the faint sunlight of the rising dawn.

"You are engaged to an Elf?" he said in more of a statement than a question.

"Please don't tease me about it. I already get enough from Gandalf. He's been waiting for me for almost 200 years and I want to—" I said as I put the bracelet back on my wrist. Bard slowly walked up to me, his eyes filled with warmth and love as he interrupted my rambling with an embrace. Hesitantly I placed my hands on his back and he whispered in my ear.