Changes // Toni Shalifoe (DISCONTINUED)

2:10

Fatin washed Nora's clothes. When she came back, she kept glancing at me. I was confused when she gave me a smile. Fatin hadn't really been talking to me much. Not since she thought me and Leah were crazy. My heart lightens a bit when Fatin walks over, nudges my shoulder and gives me a hug, "What's this for?"

"I'm sorry. I've been a total bitch."

"Not completely," I say slowly, "Not enough to apologize."

"Well I thought a lot of mean, shitty stuff." My eyebrows furrow and I pull back from her, "Not that you knew..."

"Right." I say slowly.

"Leah, and you, you two are just brave."

"Mostly Leah." I mumble. My eyebrows stay furrowed as Fatin lets out a shaky breath. She holds Nora's clothes in her hand and I try to figure out what changed her mood. She grips Nora's journal, keeping it close to her chest, "What's all this about?"

"I just fucking love you... Leah too, in a different way. I just want us to be chill again."

"We are," I tell her, "There was never a time where we weren't. Don't apologize, Fatin."

"Thanks Em," Fatin smiles at me. 

"So, in a different way?" I question.

"I'm not picky on who I like. Or bone." Fatin shrugs. I smile, nodding slightly.

Before I can say more, Toni walks over to us. Dot, Shelby and Martha followed behind her, "We're starting." Dot says. I nod at her, hooking my arm with Fatin's as I grab Toni's hand and we walk over to where Rachel is. She sits above the makeshift grave. Her eyes glued to it.

I feel my heart rate increase as I look at the grave. I wasn't able to handle Jeanette's, but I can push myself through this. For Rachel's sake. For the rest of the girl's. Toni grips my hand tightly as we look upon the girls. 

I watch as each girl lays down their own offering to Nora. When it's my turn, I lay down the crown from Dot's birthday. Dot smiled at the memory, nodding slightly before grabbing her last cigarette and placing it on the grave.

When we finish, Rachel asked for time alone with Nora. We left her and went back to camp so she can process her grief in peace. I sat down next to Toni, resting my head on her shoulder as the girls converse around us. 

"Do you guys think our parents had our funeral already?" Martha asks.

"Jesus, I didn't think about that." Fatin says.

"Yeah," Dot sighs, "I mean... we've been gone long enough to..."

"Be dead to the world." Leah says, "God, my parents. I love them, but they definitely got the funeral wrong. Like, all the wrong embarrassing photos. They definitely picked the worst song."

"My parents probably cried a lot," Martha sighs, "But trying to be strong for my sisters. I just hope they're taking good care of bunny."

"They are." Toni reassures her, "Your mom is definitely taking care of Mr. Bunniesworth."

"I just hope my mom puts my headstone next to Ethan's. I already know she wouldn't hold a funeral." I mumble, leaning my head on my hands. Toni puts a comforting hand on my knee, making me smile just the slightest.

Dot scoffs, "Fucking Gretchen Klein," Dot says, "She and her whole 'don't you deserve good things' sales pitch." 

"Who are you talking about?" Martha asks.

"Gretchen Klein," Dot says, "You know, the girl from the welcome video. I don't think she's an actual doctor but that's how she introduced herself-"

"Wait you met her?" I ask quickly, my head snapping up as my eyes widen.

"Yeah, didn't you guys?" Dot asks, confused. All of us shake our head. I look over at Leah, but she ignores me. However, Fatin catches my eye. She also looks like she's thinking hard. I feel a squeeze on my knee and look at Toni who also furrows her eyebrows, "Oh... well, she just gave me a donut. Did her little song and dance selling me on this retreat. Said she can sort out child services."

"You never questioned why? I mean, no offence, but why would she care?" I ask. Dot just shrugs her shoulder, "I mean... why would someone care about sending a girl on some woman's fucking retreat? We were all forced because of our parents. And, I mean, you saved our ass more than once-"

"Em-" Toni starts but I stand up.

"And we all knew CPR-"

"Emma-" Fatin says.

"And we get stuck on this stupid fucking island away from everyone. Forced to survive. We all had some fucked up shit happens to us-"

"EMMA!" Toni shakes me. I stop and look at her with wide eyes. My head looks around and each of the girls are looking at me both confused and slightly scared.

"Fuck... sorry." I mumble, "It's just weird."

"Let's try not to go down that path," Leah says, "Trust me, Emma, it doesn't end well." My mouth drops slightly. I furrow my eyebrows at her, feeling my chest go heavy. I nod slowly, backing away and sitting myself down. Toni goes to grab my hand, but I pull it into my chest as I continue to look at the ground. 

~~~

That night, I left campsite. That feeling of all the girls looking at me, feeling crazy... I didn't like it. I need proof. I need to not feel crazy. If not for everyone else to believe me, to prove that I'm fighting for something real. If not, they'll think I'm crazy.

Except Toni. She doesn't believe I'm crazy.

I know Toni won't like that I went on my own, but she'll be okay with it when she sees the proof I find. The proof I now have to find. 

I pull out the map from my bra. I try to figure out where I currently am and see if there could be anything useful. I decided to head out to one of the location a bit farther. It will take a long time, the girls will notice I'm gone, but it'll be worth it.

Hopefully. 

~~~

The walk over took the night. The sun was beginning to rise again and I move my pace to a jog. When I get to the site, I take a deep breath and look for anything that stands out. I look up and furrow my eyebrows at something that's sitting in the tree. 

A part of me sighs when I see it's up high, but I get a running start and begin to climb the tree, When I get to the top, I grab the box and look at it. My eyes furrow at the box, looking at it and trying to figure out what it could be. 

My heart drops when I see it's a tape recorder. 

I open it up and see a tape in there. My heart beats rapidly as I close it and hover my finger over the play button. I take a deep breath before finally pressing it.

It's day 22, I think. Nora's voice plays. My heart races when I hear it, This is the latest update for the log of the Dawn of Eve experiment. We saw a plane, but it never came back. Dot's taken it the hardest, letting us eat all the food. I don't know how much longer we can stay on this island. I think I should call it in, but we have to last longer than the boys. To prove Gretchen's theory.

The boys? What the fuck? Dawn of Eve experiment?

Leah is getting suspicious. I need you guys to keep an eye on the cameras. If you see her get worse... Pull. Us. Out. This is all I can say, before the girl's get back. I'll call you about the location of this recorder. Put it in the log with the others.

When the tape stops. My heart is beating so fast I can barely process anything, "Holy shit." I mumble. I look down at the tape recorder, "The phone... cameras... this." I lean back against the tree and wait to try and process all this shit, "What the fuck am I going to do with all of this?" I say to myself. However, a smile breaks out on my face as I realize what I finally have.

I found my proof.