Beyond

Struggle

Lance ruffled his hair, it was still damp from the shower but he was glad to get into a fresh pair of clothes and to wash away the sweat of the nightmare.

He knew it wasn't real, Pidge's death... Well all of them, he wasn't there to see it. He didn't see them die but...

He sighed heavily running a hand down his face.

"Focus on the now." He mumbled softly. "You can't change the past."

With that in mind he pulled away from his own sorry reflection and headed back towards the kitchen.

When he arrived back into the main kitchen he found the other Avengers all there.

Which Lance felt might be odd but he couldn't quite grasp why.

Breakfast was ready and Lance instantly recognised the smell as that of pancakes.

How could he not?!

"Who made pancakes?!" He asked, bounding over immediately to verify that they were in fact pancakes.

He couldn't keep the smile off his face, he hadn't had pancakes in deca-pheobs.

Clint gave him a smug smile and ruffled his still damp hair. "Did ma best."

"They smell amazing." Lance admitted as Steve handed him a plate with two on it. "I haven't had pancakes in years."

"So um..." Steve started looking nervous. Not a good sign. "Can we talk?"

Lance jolted eyes snapping around the room, oh boy. "What about?"

"We're worried about you Lance." Natasha admitted. "You look stressed."

Lance made an offended noise. "Stressed? That's a new one."

Of course he was trying to brush it off, fake it till you make it Lance.

Just carry on like everything is fine.

"We just want to know how we can help you young one." Thor explained. "If you can give us some details, nothing distressing if you don't want to discuss it."

Ah.

Details.

Lance sighed placing his plate down. "Guess we're doing this then."

He pushed himself to sit up on the counter playing with the sleeve of the purple jumper he was wearing.

He assumed it was Clint's, but he couldn't really be bothered to ask.

The kitchen was quiet for a while, no one knew what to say and it seemed that Lance was trying to gather his thoughts.

Or stall the inevitable.

Maybe both.

Lance didn't even know why he was doing this, but he knew that the Avengers couldn't look him up in some data base, they couldn't find Haggar's history and understand the danger he was always in.

He was the only place they could get answers and Lance's grieving heart was trying to shut him up.

Maybe he should just say no?

But that felt rude.

Really rude.

He couldn't do it.

These people had tried to help him, welcomed him into their home, trusted his slightly crazy chatting with a small glowing lion.

They deserved the truth.

He could give them that much.

For all their kindness he would try.

"I don't... I don't think I've mentioned Haggar to you before." Lance whispered. "She's one of the evil guys trying to destroy innocent people's lives."

"Sounds like a wonderful woman." Tony joked getting a frown from Steve.

Lance gave a faint chuckle. "Yeah, no, you would not like her."

"What has she done?" Bruce asked softly.

Lance looked towards the window, eyes distant, seeing more than just the room and the city around them.

"She took everything from me." Lance whispered frowning slightly. "Just because she could."

"She killed your friends." Thor said solemnly. "What a monster."

Lance offered a shrug, more trying to dislodge the heavy ache that tried to cut off his airways. "She didn't stop there."

"What do you mean?"

"I came here by accident." Lance admitted looking at his feet now. "Blue opened a wormhole because when... When Haggar uses her power it drains everything nearby," he paused eyes flickering about the group, "it kills planets."

"Planets?" Bruce breathed, eyes wide. "How?"

"I don't know, but she um... Absorbed earth to kill me." Lance said voice so soft they almost didn't hear him. "Or at least try to... Anyway, my family, my friends everything I know is... It's gone."

"You lost everything?" Tony breathed running his hands through his hair as he walked away slightly. "Kid I'm so sorry."

Lance shrugged. "It wasn't your fault, it was Haggar's and... And maybe Alfor's for not ending this war when it started but... Yeah."

"You're so brave." Natasha whispered a she pulled Lance into a hug.

Lance leaned into her with a sigh, it shook more than he would admit and it made his chest ache. But he didn't want to start crying, he didn't want to fall apart. Not right now. "Can we have pancakes now?"

"You bet kid." Clint smiled patting his shoulder. "How about a game of Mario kart too?"

"Only if Steve and Bruce play." Lance smirked, it wasn't quite his real smirk but it seemed to relax the others a bit more. "And... Can we not talk about this again please?"

"We might have to." Bruce said gently. "But we won't push you, you can always refuse."

Lance nodded. That was a solid deal. One he could agree to with a small, faint, honest smile. "Okay."