BE THE CHANGE // BUCKY BARNES X OC

SEVENTEEN

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Bucky just stared at me. Blankly. For what felt like a fucking eternity and I didn't know what to do, or what to say. What could I say? It had happened. Not in a bad way, I'd sought him out, I just mean it's what we do sometimes when we have needs.

"Ok." He said flatly with a tiny shrug and I'd have preferred if he'd gotten mad, not this carefree reaction. "You aren't together though right?" I threw my pillow at him, biting back the giggle as he chuckled softly, throwing it back at me and I hugged it, looking at him over it. "No. It was just a one time thing." I replied matter-of-factly.

He rolled towards me and shrugged. I wasn't sure if I liked this reaction, but I guess it confirmed he really only saw me as a friend. I put my pillow back down and fluffed it before I dropped my head to it. "Can I ask why?" My head snapped to him, actual shock on my face at his question.

"Ahh...I umm, it had been a while and well, I guess I needed it and he had offered soooo." My words came out all messed up and I don't know why I'd been so forthcoming with him but I'd laid it out now so there was no point hiding anything. "Are you worried?" He asked quietly and I bit my knuckles softly. "Of him? No, he wouldn't hurt me. That he might have wanted more? Yeah, thats what I'm kinda stressing about."

I rolled over and stared up at the ceiling. Jesus. He's just so, chill about this. Really chill about it. "Were you worried about telling me?" His voice was gentle and quiet, and I felt him move closer, and as I smiled weakly with a tiny huff, he leant up on his elbow. My eyes moved to his. "Honestly...yeah, I was." I confessed softly, my fingers playing with the sheets beside me.

He sighed, his eyes scanning the room, getting lost in his head as his brows furrowed deeply. What was he thinking? Was he judging me and my choices? Would he do that? I trusted him. Wholeheartedly trusted him, that was why I could, in the end, just be honest about it, about Blackwood. But that didn't stop me asking. "Are you...are you disappointed in me?"

Bucky snapped back to me, his eyes dark, yet warm and I sunk into my pillow just a tiny bit more, feeling trapped under his gaze. "Now why would I be disappointed? You have needs. You sort out someone you could trust." He said sternly, but softly and I felt my cheeks heat up. I trust you too. More than anyone. My mind said and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to stop my mouth from repeating it.

He laid down and lifted his left arm for so I shuffled closer, laying partially on his bed and partially on mine, and he wrapped his arm around my waist, holding me to him. I felt his hand on my hip, his fingers gently moving in tiny circles and felt how my body heated, reacted to his touch. If I thought I was horny before, I was fucking on fire now.

So I couldn't stop myself from drawing small circles on his chest, and when that wasn't enough I ran my hand down his chest to the hem of his shirt and gently lifted it up, moving my fingers slowly back up the panes of his stomachs, feeling his muscles twitch slightly until he grunted and I stopped. He tensed slightly and I withdrew my hand, sitting up as he sat up too, looking at me sideways, studying me like he would a target and I felt my skin crawl slightly.

He pulled his shirt off and laid back down while I just stared at him, dumbfounded. "What? I know you do that when you're stressed and it's nice." He tilted his head slightly, brows drawn together but smiled softly at me anyway. I wasn't exactly stressed but fuck it. I laid back down and moved my fingers, gently following the contours of his chest and stomach as his hand went back to my hip, his finger drawing their tiny circles again.