la douleur exquise🌙

38• I don't Deserve You

Debbie walked and leaned against the railings purposely putting distance between them. " I miss my Lou," she whispered, barely audible.

"I miss her too."

Lou recalled vividly the first time Debbie called her my Lou. It was that night...

~2012~

When you're friends with the bar owner that gives you free bottles of vodka. Who in her right mind would say no?

Going to a bar wasn't as much fun after Lou had Debbie to come home to. She had tried to get back into it. There were some good bars in the area but once she was there, her heart wasn't in it because all she could think about was Debbie. However that night Lou didn't even think twice when Nine asked her if she wanted a drink. She agreed instantly. It was only two or three shots at first, but then they started talking, and then they lost count.

"I love this," Lou muttered, pointing to the nearly empty bottle of vodka, cheeks flushed from drunkenness. "But something is missing to make it perfect."

Nine looked at her and chuckled. "Something or someone?" She asked, handing Lou another bottle. "Do you want to get over your little crush on that brunette?"

Debbie has fully recovered and has started working again. Lou knows Debbie won't need her anymore. She knows that at any moment the brunette will leave her house and return back to her own. And she'll have no choice but to let her go. She'll have no choice but to go back, back to her life in LA, in her job, her own company. But the problem is she didn't want to; she wanted to stay. In her new home... with Debbie.

"How?" Lou asked, smiling.

"Those girls," Nine motioned to the left corner of the bar. They've been staring at you since they came here.

It was two long-haired brunettes. Lou scoffs and shakes her head. "Not interested."

She's only interested in her, that infuriating girl. That impossible woman who's now having a welcome-back party and probably also drinking right now. She knows that no amount of similar brown eyes or a beautiful long-haired brunette would be enough. Because it's Debbie that she likes and no one else.

"I should leave now."

"Lou." Nine said while draining a shot of her drink. "You should tell her."

"Tell her what?"

"That you like her. That you want her to stay." Lou responded only with a wave of her hand, a sign of dismissing the subject.

When she returned home, the absence of light in the house indicates that Debbie is still out. Lou stumbled down into the house, kicked her shoes off, and walked dazedly into the living room. She's dying to be in her room where she could finally pass out but doesn't have the energy to climb upstairs so she flopped down on the couch and buried herself in the pillow. Lou had been with Nine for way longer than she intended, drinking far more than she probably should have. She was sure the result would be a hangover when she woke up tomorrow.