Forbidden Things

Chapter seven

-Tate-

i can't believe i just did that. of course she didn't believe me. I mean I didn't even believe myself. I don't regret punching Callie.

how am i going to get this done. she's never going to fall for it. she's too smart for that. I have to come up with a better plan. maybe I should just keep doing the same as usual. maybe I should just be a bitch to her. then at least I can talk to her that way. I just can't get a word out of my throat when I try to be nice to Callie.

we are doing a dribbling exercise. but I can't really concentrate. my attention is only on Callie. how could I not have noticed this? I know what life is like as the daughter of a mafia boss. how could I not have seen Callie live such a life. I've seen her father before. he sometimes comes to watch our games on Friday. he seems like a normal man. nothing mafia about it. I wonder if Callie knows that her father and my father have been at war for years. I always told my parents I wanted nothing to do with it. but what if she does live that life? the life I've always kept such a distance from.

''Tate what are you doing?'' I hear coach say from the other side of the field which takes me out of my thoughts.

"Tate, if you can't focus on my training, I want you to leave. we can't use that as a team'' adds coach

I can not stand him. If I don't receive a ball well, it doesn't mean I can't focus. I can't listen to his nonsense any longer.

"fine whatever i'll go" i yell back at him

I grab my water bottle and walk towards the changing rooms.

"Tate what is wrong with you?" I hear Madison say

I didn't realize she was coming after me. I so want to tell her. i want to tell her i lied about everything. i want to tell her about my real life. and about Callie. but i can't

''can you please leave me alone'' i yell at her

I know I could have said it differently. but i just want to be alone for a while.

"sure Tate whatever," she says disappointed

I hate this. i hate my father and his stupid plan. i hate everything that has to do with it. i hate callie and the fact i have to make her fall in love with me. Suddenly I feel a wave of panic come over me. I feel like I can't breathe. I feel my heartbeat in my throat. I close my eyes but all I see is Jacob. i only see my brother.

it's my father's fault he's dead. he put him in danger. and now he has put me in danger again. it is a big risk and my father knows that. yet he leaves it to me.

I start sweating and shaking. is this what a panic attack feels like? because I'm sure I'm in total panic.

"here, drink some water"

I look up in shock to see Callie standing across from me. what is she doing here? If there's anyone I don't want to see right now, it's Callie.

"What do you want?" I ask irritated.

''Coach asked if I could get you. He wants everyone to be there when we discuss tactics for Friday''

I take the bottle of water from Callie's hand and drink some water.

"And I'm here to tell you to change your attitude, I don't care if you feel like shit today, but don't take it out on others."

wait really? Callie Grey tells me to change my attitude? what a joke.

"Maybe you should take a look at yourself before giving advice to others"

oh no, i can't believe i just said that. Saying things like that doesn't help me. But i can not help it. always when i look at her i have to say something to annoy her. it's a habit.