Zoe's only wish is to be able to run barefoot through grass, but she knows it'll never happen. Ever since she was born, she's been unable to touch anything living without it instantly dying. It's a curse she would do anything to get rid of, but that...
I had no idea for how long we held onto each before we finally let go. When we did, I was much calmer and, judging from her smile, so was she. Almost as if the previous scene hadn't happened. And that raw and terrifying power which had been around her had receded and almost seemed to have been my imagination.
"Let's go for a walk," I suggested. "There's a nice park close to here."
"Sure," she said and smiled.
We held hands and started walking. We were silent all the way to the park. It was a comfortable silence, but I had too much buzzing in my head to let it last.
"Can we do a thing?" I asked her.
"Depends on the thing," she answered and smiled at me teasingly, though there was apprehension in her eyes.
"We each take turns asking the other questions. And the answers must be truthful."
I saw how the apprehension grew within her. She bit her lip, like she always did. But finally decided to nod.
"What's your favorite book?" I asked, starting it off light, and I could see how she visibly relaxed.
"The Wonderful Wizard of Oz," she answered without much thought. "It was one of the first books I read and it stuck with me."
"I would not guess that one as anyone's first book. Even if it would be something old, then something like Narnia feels more likely."
"Narnia wasn't... I was much older when I read the Narnia books. What's your favorite book?"
"Winnie-the-Pooh, for the same reason."
"Had any imaginary friends of your own?" She gave me a sly smile and a wink.
"You already asked your question," I pointed out.
"Oh, come on!" she said and jokingly shoved me. "Can't we make it so we ask each second, but both have to answer all questions?"
I laughed. "Okay fine. And no I didn't."
"Neither did I."
"Favorite movie?"
She blushed and bit her lip.
One day I'm definitely going to be the one biting that lip.
"I've never seen a movie," she said and looked away.
I stopped, not believing that I had heard her correctly.
"Never?"
"Never," she echoed.
"I definitely have to change that. And I'll wait with telling you mine and I'll just show it to you later."
She smiled. It was that childlike smile, full of pure happiness. A smile that could light up even the darkest of places.
"What would your dream job be?" she asked.
"Well, so, I work in the more administrative part of my dad's company at the moment. But I would love to work with the jewelry design. With us only selling religious jewelry, it's somewhat limited though, but I would want to change that as well. You?"
"I guess what I would want wouldn't be a job in some sense." She got a far-away look in her eyes, as if she watched ahead to a hypothetical future. "I would want to grow my own garden and make enough food from it to survive. Made sell a bit to get money for other necessities."
"I guess that answers my next question. Living: city or countryside?"
"I actually really like the location of your house. I would tear down the fence though, so it's not isolated from the nature."
"Think I would love that too. And you can grow our food and I'll make jewelry, so we have money for other things."
"That sounds beautiful."
She had a wistful look on her face, and I was sure I had a similar one. It really would be a perfect future. I could imagine sitting outside and watch her take care of our plants while I came up with new designs. Or maybe we would go into the woods together and pick mushrooms. Or just lay on the grass, surrounded by the scent of nature and just talk as peacefully as we did now.
We had come to an open piece of grass in the park and not far away was a man playing a guitar. We didn't have to communicate with one another as we sat down.
"What names do you like?" she asked when we were seated.
"Zoe," I answered without any hesitation. She hit my arm lightly.
"Not what I meant, silly," she laughed. "What other names do you like?"
It felt somewhat surreal. Just a little while ago, I had been worried about her leaving again and now she asked me about names. I tried to not make my mind spin out of control, but what else than for future babies would she be asking that question? And she had herself been telling me she couldn't give me what I deserved just moments ago, and I was sure kids were included in that.
But I wasn't about to question it. The atmosphere was too nice. So even if it all was just wishful thinking from both of us, we wouldn't stop it.
"I've never thought much about it," I admitted. "I've always liked the name Ivy."
"Ivy," she said, as if tasting the name. "I like it."
"Any ideas yourself?"
"It's a bit silly, really. But I've always just liked nature, so always liked all nature related names. Like Ivy."
She smiled, but then the smile started to falter. I could see where her thoughts were taking her and before she had time to spiral, I put my hand over hers.
"We could always adopt. Or some other way. That's anyway for the future. We don't have to worry about that yet."
She smiled again, but there was a clear sadness there. A sadness I was willing to do anything to make go away. So I quickly changed the topic to the only one that was in the front of my mind.
"When I asked about you meeting Alex before... I am hesitant about it. But not for the reason I think you think I am. I just... Alex can be a lot. She can be very blunt and lacks a filter on occasions. It's not that I don't want you to meet her, it's that I don't want her to meet you. I'm afraid that she'll say something stupid and..."
"And you want to protect me from getting hurt?" she finished for me and I nodded sheepishly.
She looked away, into the crowd that had gathered to listen to the music. She seemed completely lost in thought for a moment before she turned back and smiled.
"For our future to be as perfect as we want, I would have to meet her sooner or later."
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