Zoe's only wish is to be able to run barefoot through grass, but she knows it'll never happen. Ever since she was born, she's been unable to touch anything living without it instantly dying. It's a curse she would do anything to get rid of, but that...
I had let them talk and explain the different things that needed answers without interrupting. It was all mildly confusing to me. For instance, I really didn't understand why her dad had upheld the promise to the faerie all these years. It had been over one hundred years for crying out loud. How could any promise be worth watching someone you care about suffer for so long? I knew that there had to be something about faeries that I didn't know that explained it, and as much as I wanted answers to the questions gathering in me, that didn't really matter. Zoe was the one that needed the answers right then and there, and my task was to make it easier for her to handle it.
When they were done, Zoe held my hand and together we walked outside. She didn't say anything, but just walked around the plants. She seemed to be inspecting them and my guess was that she used that to distract herself from everything else.
We came to a rosebush. There were several withered flowers and leaves. She frowned at it and started picking out the dead parts. To begin with, she did it slowly and carefully, but for each dead thing she pulled, her movements became more and more aggressive.
"Zoe," I said tentatively, trying to pull her out of whatever train of thought she was stuck in.
But she either didn't care or was too deep into her thoughts so that she didn't hear. I called her name again, stronger that time. But still nothing. Her movements only got even more careless and as she made to pull a leaf out, a thorn cut her finger. She didn't seem to notice and went to pull out the next leaf.
"Zoe!" I said, now harshly, and grabbed hold of her wrist.
She looked up at me and there was a cloud in her eyes that seemed to dispel as they met mine.
"You're bleeding," I continued and held her hand gingerly in mine. It wasn't a big cut, but enough for a drop of blood to come through. I lifted her hand to my lips and kissed away the one drop.
Her eyes followed my movement and when I kissed the finger she had cut, tears fell from her eyes. I pulled her to me and she grabbed hold of my t-shirt with her fists while sobbing hard into my chest.
I didn't say anything, I didn't think there were any words I could say that would help in that moment. But I was also sure that no words were needed. The fact that I was there was likely the best comfort I could give her at that moment.
"I really was made to be a murderer," she said into my shirt when her tears had subsided.
My heart broke at her words. My beautiful, innocent Zoe.
"We've been through this. You're not a murderer," I said firmly.
"Aren't I?" she said weakly and moved away slightly to look into my eyes. Her eyes were red and her face puffy from the crying. There was even some snot under her nose, but even through that, she was so fucking beautiful and she was so fucking pure.
"No," I refuted, and it wasn't just because I wanted her to feel better. I knew it to be the truth. If she would have ever been given a choice, she would never have killed. "You did what you had to, to survive. If you hadn't followed the coven's orders, they would have hurt you and your dad. Possibly even killed you. And they would have found other ways of killing those people. The ones to blame for those deaths are the coven, and the one to blame for that you became their tool is that faerie."
"But I did it. I killed them all. Their deaths are on me. It's my fault."
"It's not, and nothing will get better from you blaming yourself and living in the past. Isn't that what you helped my dad with? Moving on?" I tried to give her a smile, but she just continued to look devastated.
"But how could I ever? It's so many people, Felix. So many innocent people." Her body shook, and the tears streamed down her cheeks again.
"By just being who you truly are," I told her and hugged her to me again. "You're so kind and caring towards others. I wish you could be that to yourself as well."
We both went quiet and just stood there. I knew she cried again, but that time, no sound came from her.
After a few minutes, Ash and Pine came up on either side of me. They didn't say anything, but walked past and to the roses Zoe had worked on. Not sure what they were going to do, but knowing Zoe needed to see it, I loosened my grip on her slightly and turned her so she could watch them.
As one, Ash and Pine stretched their hands forward and touched the roses. What had seconds ago looked dead immediately bloomed tall and bright. The two nymphs turned to us with shining smiles and then held their hands towards Zoe. I let her go and watched as Ash and Pine led her around the garden. As soon as they spotted a flower that looked dead, they got Zoe to touch it and the flower would be full of life again.
"See," Pine said in a soft voice. "Life is everywhere inside of you."
"You can heal everything and everyone," Ash continued and stroked a few strands of Zoe's hair to behind her ear. "Including yourself."
"But you have to remember that you're not alone," Pine pointed out.
"When it feels too much, just come and find us and we will guide you to life again," Ash concluded.
"We love you, Zoe," I added, and she turned back to me. Her eyes were still red from the tears. But some of the endless sadness seemed to have gone.
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