-DISCONTINUED-ISH-Between the Lines, A Lams Fanfic-DISCONTINUED-ISH-

32~Espousal~32

TW: Kissing, A LOT and I mean a lot of sexual jokes are made in this one like just saying. 

Wednesday: 5:43 AM

Thomas was curled up on James at the couch, watching James move the food on his plate around with his fork. Both of their puffy coats were ditched in the kitchen.

The eggs hit the bacon with a sad thump, and Thomas could hear the clinking of the utensils against the plate. He could see the hunger in James's eyes, but he wouldn't eat. 

Tears prickled in James's eyes as Thomas wrapped his arm around his shoulder, yanking him into a hug. The scent of bacon, eggs, and pancakes filled the air, making James's stomach growl.

 You're not hungry, James berated himself

He could feel the warmth of James's body against his chest as he held him tightly. He could hear James's sobs, the sound muffled by his chest. 

He rubbed James's back gently, hoping to soothe him. "I'm sorry," James cried, his voice muffled by Thomas's chest.

"You're okay, you're not doing anything wrong," Thomas reassured him, rubbing his back gently. "You're trying your best, and that would be enough."

James's body shook with sobs as he suppressed his face in Thomas's chest. Thomas could feel the dampness of James's tears seeping through his shirt, but he didn't care. He just held James tighter, wanting to comfort him in any way he could.

"My best is not eating, Thomas," James sobbed, trying to push himself out of Thomas's embrace. 

"I'm such a bad boyfriend. Date anyone else than me. So many people would love to have you, and I'm over here like a shadow, not letting you date anyone else."

"You could cheat on me, I wouldn't mind," James added, his voice barely above a whisper. "I can see why. I mean, why would you even like me? You're probably just dating me for pity points. I'm ugly, fat, and, unattractive" James mumbled.

"Hey, for one, you are amazing," Thomas said firmly, his grip tightening on James's shoulders. 

"I don't pretend to know the challenges you're facing, The words you keep saying and forming in your mind, I know who I'm dating, so long as you show you're trying to change. That would be enough." Thomas whispered, his voice cracking.

"You are going through something right now, and that's okay. You have been with me through thick and thin, James. You throwing up because of bad thoughts isn't going to change that." Thomas reassured him.

Thomas could feel James's body relax slightly at his words, and he knew he was getting through to him. He continued to rub James's back in slow circles, hoping to soothe him further. "James, you have been with me from the start," Thomas continued, his voice softening. 

"From when John almost died, and I began to distance myself away from you." Thomas held James closer, rocking them back and forth.

"You didn't give up on me. You were by my side the entire time. When I came out to my mom, when I was at my lowest, James, you were right there." Thomas started crying with James as he spoke.

"And I know I can be over the top, annoying, and generally a pain to hang out with, and I don't know why you haven't broken up with me yet. I'm annoying and bratty, and-"

"Because I love you," James cut him off, his voice firm.

Thomas felt a warmth spread through his chest at James's words. He knew James loved him, but it was always wonderful to hear it out loud.

"Sorry, I'm making this about myself," Thomas said, shaking his head. 

"But, James, you were always with me, so I should always be with you, and I always will be with you. Because I love you too, James. You're my everything." Thomas kissed James's forehead, then his cheeks, his lips, showering him with affection.