A Court of Secrets and Moonlight

20: Training

Rhysand

I couldn't sleep.

I couldn't even bring myself to try.

Why had I not gone with them?

I carried Feyre up to bed 5 hours ago. An hour after that, Mor and Cassian had stopped by to let me know they were back. They had no issues getting in, and Leur and Azriel would have no issues getting out. They caused enough of a commotion on the eastern borders that nobody would be looking towards the center of the territory for a long time.

Still, a gnawing feeling dug at me. I was worried about my sister and Azriel, making up horrid scenarios in my mind as I waited in the darkness. But more than that, I couldn't stop thinking about Leur's story.

Even calling it a story made it feel like I didn't believe her, and the thought felt sour on my tongue.

There was just so much she wasn't saying, and I couldn't see why. I had so many questions and so little answers. But overarching over them all was that stupid blood bargain.

How had I not known it was there? Was it truly so undetectable?

And more so, why make it in the first place? Why would the bargain need to be passed down?

The obvious answer was that my father wanted to ensure that Leur would not just have me or someone else kill him and come home. But my father was not stupid, and he knew well enough to know that no matter how horribly he treated her- she wouldn't kill him. Unless he had done something to her, something worse than sending her on his personal missions and to Hybern.

Still, that didn't seem like the answer. I wracked my brain, thinking back to those last few months. I despised the fact the the King had been right, I was distracted. I wasn't watching my sister, and even looking back on the memories I can remember feeling that something had been truly off with her. More so than just recovering from the trauma of the war, but something deeper. She stopped coming out with us to Rita's, spent enough time in the Spring Court that she was practically living there, was always off on her own doing something.

And there were no answers.

I couldn't go in her mind and find them myself. First of all, she'd feel me within seconds. Second, she was capable of creating deeply intricate shields within someone's mind. If I had to wager a guess, looking in her head would be damn near impossible. And third, It just felt wrong. If she didn't want me to know, perhaps I should just cut my losses and move on. She was home and safe, intact and alive. Would focusing so hard on the past really bring anything more than invading her privacy?

And something told me I wouldn't like what I found.

It was just hard not to know. Especially when her past was the enemy coming back to haunt us currently.

Soft footsteps crunched outside, both of them so silent I wouldn't have heard it if I didn't have every one of my senses outreached to look for them. Twin spies, the scent of cedar and lavender combined with the unmistakable smell of the mating bond. Hand in hand, they walked into the door. I hadn't bothered letting Leur know that the blood wards that kept the townhouse safe would not keep her out. Not when we had the same blood flowing in our veins.

There were smiles on both of their faces as they walked into the living room where I was waiting, my sister dropping her mate's hand to bound into my arms. Something was different between them, even more than those marbled shadows swirling around them. Something unbreakable, something whole. As if they were one unit, one soul inexplicably bound. I didn't let myself think too hard about it for fear of vomiting.

The tension in my body faded as she hugged me, as I spied Azriel without a single scratch on him waiting at the doorway. A strong power emanated off of her, one I had not noticed previously. It seemed to sing in the air, something bold and intrinsically good. Something powerful enough that the ground under my feet seemed to buzz with it. And then she pulled back from me, and I noticed a sword sheathed at her hip.