A Court of Secrets and Moonlight

55: Aftermath

Leur

The room morphed into utter chaos within moments. Rhys and Mor were holding Helion by the shoulders, begging him to keep quiet about my existence. Feyre and Cassian were running down the hall to meet with the other High Lords. I didn't hear any of it.

There was nothing but this cut on my hand.

You're my best friend, Leur. I've always died when you do.

Azriel had pulled me into his arms as the wall snapped, covering me with his body and shadows. He hadn't let go yet. I could hear him speaking to me, begging me to move, to do something, anything.

But Tamlin had made a blood bargain.

Somewhere in my head, I knew the logistics. I knew that he had made the bargain with the King, and the blood bargain was the only thing that could override it. Which meant that if I required the Spring Court, I could request it and it would be mine- not the King's. Logistically, I knew why he had done what he did.

But the rest of me? My heart? I wanted to hate him for it. I wanted to scream in his face, beat some sense into him. Make him see how utterly irresponsible this was, what a stupid decision he had made. What he had just bound us together by could not be undone by anything but the Cauldron itself. But then his voice sounded again, those words that he had said-

You are my best friend, Leur. I have always died when you do.

Weren't they the truth?

"Azriel, you need to go." I heard the echo of my brother's voice, booming and commanding.

"No!" My mate answered, shaking me by the shoulders, "I'm not leaving her."

Is that not how I felt about him, about my family, about Azriel?

"Go, Az." Another voice said.

Had it not been me who had said that there was no point to life if you are alone?

I was shaking, I realized. Shaking and lost in my own head, in the gravity of what had happened here tonight. I felt Azriel's hands leave me, and I wanted to beg for him to come back. I wanted to follow him, to do anything but stand here.

A sharp slap across my cheek ripped me from my own head.

All of the physical pain came rushing back at once. Mainly the burning of the bargain running through my veins, and the throbbing pain in my shoulder. Nesta was standing in front of me, panting. I blinked at her, everything coming back into focus.

"Did you just fucking slap me?" I asked, shocked as I lifted a hand to my cheek.

"We don't have time for you to go catatonic again." She hissed, "We need to get back to Velaris."

The room was empty now aside from Mor and Nesta. My cousin was staring at the female in shock, like she couldn't believe Nesta had hit me either. My cheek stung with the force of it, but it wasn't hard enough to bruise.

I blinked at her, muttering under my breath, "It hurt."

Nesta only rolled her eyes, "Get over it."

I shook my head, putting it aside, "Right, let's go."

---------

I was pretty sure the only way I'd ever get Amren out of this house would be to kick her out. She had taken a particular liking to the suite that was meant originally for Azriel, the grandeur and shining jewels calling to her.

"What the fuck happened to you?" She surveyed me as I walked in the front door, setting down the Book of Breathings on the coffee table in front of her. Mor and Nesta were trailing behind me, two sets of wary eyes trained on my back.