The eternality in our ephemerality

Chapter 38. Time is worse than detention. It never stops.

The clock's arms continued to exercise; the force between the both of us expanded and grew stronger as each of us exhaled our breaths.

None said a word.

I, decided to stop the tenseness, breathed as gently as my lungs would allow me to do so, but, the overhauling sensation was only toughened by this. My mortified body was too scared to interrupt and too brave to allow him to be the first...

How could he had been so cruel? As selfish?

Expose my ache in order to get the 'hero' type....I ran away from being the damsel in distress and the more I do, the more I get closer into the labels these chains hold me down.

But the chains were not just mine: I had chained him into my secret just as he had chained me to his secret, both of our chains pressed our hearts and drowned our minds into hypoxia: I had imagined this, I had fantasised about him....

The silence cornered the both of us down; demanded us into an inaudible, dark room in plain sight no one but ourselves could see: I could see his battle and he mine.

His wrenched figure and my broken one.

"Look, I really am trying my best, '' he began, amazed. My lips slipped once again, neglecting every possible order I could have demanded, "I apologise for my words I said earlier; it's not fair.... For neither of ....us"

The pain I have caused,not only in his stubborn and irregular character but in my own insubstantial one which can never be neglected is its bending ability; I am too kind and too noble to hurt someone who doesn't really deserve my words.

But in order to go to heaven, you must purge your soul.

"I am guilty because I got you into detention," I began plainly, "but I still believe I don't deserve your treatment. I had hoped you'd change but apparently you're as sullen and peevish as the first time I saw you. I won't dig any longer in hopeless waters you clearly don't want me to navigate; my quest began and ended in one look of yours. You can remain being horrid, negligent, and insufferable; frigid and cold to everyone except your pomposity and unsociableness and if it's fair of me to ask I would like to remain in that veil of indifference you have placed me in, it will be safer from me and you won't dread as much...please" I defended myself... followed by a beg.

An unintentional beg that slipped my lips.

Leave me to the darkness of the truth. Or stay and bring me the light of the known.

My voice was nearly mumble, but I was absolutely tired of his games; his way of being, the inconsistencyof his actions and deeds; making a mess and not being able to clean up for yourself. It is a suffering my indulgence is not willing, anymore, to corroborate.

"I suppose you are right." He clarified. My chest now hidden under the stomach knot his words had provoked on me. "I accept my accusations with pride; but you are not so clean, for you have also placed me in a veil of anger and hastiness to forget and cleanse your soul from that moment where your vulnerability was all I can see. I suppose you are right.... Neither of us knows the other one"

I responded in a growl; too quickly and too unreal to actually seem as my one and only answer.

"We will remain in indifference" His throat twisted as his jaw spoke grittily "for neither of us is interested of knowing the other person" He added and I interrupted in the same breathe-

"If that comment would be true; I would not be here, and neither would you" I counterattacked. "That is purely yours" I corrected "I was interested to get to know you. To be your friend!" I looked away, my arms still interlocked and the fury rising slowly up my chest. I could feel the bile going up my oesophagus and my heart's rapid drumbeat.