The eternality in our ephemerality

Chapter 66. Could he be that?

The Referee's whistle sounded and with it 12 pairs of murderous eyes landed on me. Slowly evaluating how worthy his opponent was. The sun was shining high on the horizon, a sphere of golden light that tinkled in the infinite sapphire blue. That suffocating radiation was felt even in the most remote corners, just as the price for a shadow rose more and more. Sturdy, round droplets rolled slowly down inflated, sunburned, red cheeks. Crawling without energy, growing weaker as they approached the lips of those girls.

The steam was exhaled more and more frequently, the purring drums were heard without delicacy or care, a forced and constant beat. The sweat covered every inch of my clothes, the humid heat that I perspired, struggling vigorously to get out of that sauna. My hands, sweaty and uncertain, intertwined with each other, playing with each other in order to pacify my giddy and uncertain mind. My lip was unconsciously bitten by my teeth, ripped and dry. Saliva disappeared between my mouth, as if it was sheltering from internal and external burning. The hazy, weary vision broke free, my eyes struggling to stay open but the uncontrollable frenzy stopped it instantly. Time stopped; The court hummed, jumps heard, howls and murmurs found, the slow movement of the hands clapping, the sweat rolling down the rosy cheeks, the ball raised in the air....

My drum quickly quickened its melody, with it my breathing was affected as well. That fireball ended up in my open, trembling palms, bouncing undoubtedly like a metallic robot running on oil. Bounce once followed by another. My flabby arms had surrendered to the flame, my legs yearning for a bench to try in vain to extinguish the burn. But my elbows went up and the ball shot out as fast as the heat came toward me. It bounced and flashed like a flash of fury hurling scoundrels in front of my eyes; thrown, hitting the ground and rising to take another hit. It was fast, like lightning. The players were frowning and grimacing as they were about to shoot the ball. Moments of uncertainty that ignited my passion, a wildly overwhelming fury that the ball itself had provoked.

Rushed, bounced and lifted. After moans of raw passion and anger, after hurried emotions running wild, after him disappearing from my sight and out the bleachers....

We won.

Jane and Soph cheered and lifted their fists up in the air as I continued to contemplate how difficult and strange a person he was.

Walking away. Step by step. In each of those pained slow movements, his foot stamped across my faulty heart, crunching it, breaking it. Fragmented.

Once upon a time we had it all...

And like the wave coming in and erasing all the footsteps, our love faded away with the tidal sound.

Slow-too slow- his steps were. In each an echo of my breaking.

Another sheet of glass broken on my mind and the little poisonous threads of bare glass slicing my flesh apart.

He dared come here to my match. He dared to watch me after he left and I seeked, desperate for him. Looked, searched, haunted myself in his memory. Worried he could be lost, eternally lost. Preoccupied that I had hurt him enough to never return to me nor hold me in his arms. The haunting vision of me hurting him is one I can never forget, it haunts me.

The secrets he keeps and can never be opened, will they also be shut away in the drawer he has placed my memory in?

Maybe-, no. This was both of our fault, my bravery crumbled and my pride vainly posed in the way.   I pushed him away and no one can deny him the fact that my heart had chosen him. I suppose it is just another crystal blade encrusted in my bad luck.

He left, after I left him.

"Ale!" Jane screamed, throwing me violently and cruelly, without precaution and delicacy my broken heart, back to reality. I looked at her and smiled. Dragged my feet up to her and Andrew.