Down the Rabbit Hole ⚝ Killian Jones

50

I'll never forget the first time I went into that portal in Wonderland. The drop in my stomach as I free fell through a twisting vortex. I don't think I'll ever get used to that feeling, even now.

We eventually come through the other side. I nearly fall over from the intense rocking of the ship as it lands back into the water ungracefully. Thankfully, we don't capsize. I let go of the rope slowly, taking in my surroundings. It's hard to see, not just because it's dark, but also because we're pretty far out from the island. It's quite big with one large mountain peeking out of the fog. It's beautiful, but there's something ominous about it.

I walk over to the side of the ship, leaning against the edge. There's an uneasiness inside of me that I haven't felt since the asylum. The confusion between Alice, the prophecy, and Morgan. But Morgan never existed, and the prophecy doesn't matter now that Cora's dead.

So where does that leave Alice?

Alice was stolen from me the moment I learned about the prophecy. From then on, I became the girl who was fated to die. I thought I knew who I was as a kid. Every kid does. But whatever identity I had was stripped from me in the asylum. Everything I thought I knew about myself turned out to be a facade.

I married my husband because I thought I knew what love was, and it made my mother happy. I became a sailor because it's what my father did, and I loved my father, so how could that be wrong? The asylum stripped me of everything.

Or maybe it didn't. Maybe it stripped away everything I thought I was until all that was left was an empty shell. But then I had to grow thickened skin on my feet. Sharpen my teeth into fine points. File my nails into knives.

Metaphorically, but still, I came out wrong.

I got away from being the town's circus side show by being useful. I was the best weapon they had against Cora. I'm not sure how to be anything else. I sigh in frustration at myself before I'm broken out of my thoughts at the sound of Emma's voice.

"And lost Henry! And Neal! And countless other people!" She shouts at her parents.

"Emma, the minute I let go of the belief that things will get better is the moment I know they won't. We'll find Henry." Snow responds, and David nods, backing her up.

I wince. It can't be easy to try to be parents to a child you were separated from for twenty eight years.

"No, you won't." Gold appears behind me.

I jump, turning to face him. He's changed out of his usual attire for some sort of leather get up.

"Oh, well, that's a great use of our time, a wardrobe change." Hook says, rolling his eyes.

The corners of my mouth lift.

"I'm going to get Henry," Gold tells us.

"You're not helping us?" I ask incredulously.