blaze of desire // billie eilish fanfiction

fourteen : gift

delilah

"thank you." i told her.

"for what? is it always going to be like this? you thanking me after the fact?" she looked at me with a smile.

"no, i mean for the bowl thing and just today. i like spending time with you." i replied.

"i like spending time with you as well delilah."

"okay ill confess something." i sighed.

"oh no."

"shush." i let out a breathy laugh. "im sad that im leaving because that would mean that i wont see you again for a while."

"sexting is always an option." she shrugged.

"that is not what i mean!" i giggled. "you know what i mean."

"i know what you mean." she nodded, stopping outside my childhood home. i looked outside and then at her pretty eyes, not wanting to leave yet, allowing myself to get lost in them for a little moment. "your eyes are going to be the death of me."

"i could say the same to you."

"well if you don't leave the house in half an hour you'll most probably be late so..." she opened her door and i waited for her to open mine. "come on." she gave me her hand.

i stepped out of the car and she closed my door for me. it was like someone was pulling on my heart, urging me not to say goodbye. "i'll miss you." i softly smiled to mask the way my face was melting.

"come here." she smiled back with the same type of smile i had. i wrapped my hands around her and she did too. i took in her scent, trying to bottle it all up for me. i tried to remember how safe i felt in her arms, how appreciated i am.

she squeezed me tight and held me for as long as i let her. i loosened my grip on her and she kissed my cheek, "take care of yourself blaze." she told me.

"i will." i nodded. "you too okay?"

"don't worry about me, ill be perfectly fine." she told me.

"i know you'll be." i smiled and kissed her one last time. "i have to go now." i told her.

"i know, go, ill stand here and watch you walk away."

"that sounds depressing. i'll use it in my the book im writing." i replied.

"go so i can stare at your ass."

"unfortunately you can't see my ass under my this coat. i'm sorry to disappoint." i laughed. "goodbye billie."

"goodbye blaze."

i walked through the front door where mom was peeking through the window. "i knew it!" she told me.

"you were not just spying on us." i took a deep breath in.

"it's my property, i have the right to look out my window whenever i want." she told me. "she's still out there." she added.

"no she's not." i didn't believe her but it was true. billie was right where i left her, staring at the front door. "why?"

"isn't it obvious?"

"what am i supposed to do?" i frowned, just as she finally got in her car and drove away. "mom, do you like her?" i asked, my heart aching just the tiniest bit.

"yeah i do, she's a nice girl. i can see how happy she makes you baby." mom played with my hair.

"i don't want to leave." my voice cracked. "if i left that would mean going back to reality, and ive been happy these past three weeks."