blaze of desire // billie eilish fanfiction

fourty-eight : don't cry

delilah

"no elosie, you don't understand." i shook my head, soaking up my tears with a q tip before they fell
down my cheeks.

"delilah, it's okay." she tried to comfort me. "listen to me, nothing is going to go wrong. you have me as your maid of honor, lean on me."

"i need her." i shook my head. "i don't give a shit about the bad luck superstition, please." my breath started to hitch.

"i'm here!" her voice said. mom flung the door open, revealing a worried billie hurrying over to me. elle and everyone in the room other than the two of us hurried out.

"want to dip? we can run together, it's okay. tell me, what's wrong?" her thick brows frowned.

"no, no, no! i just needed you." i told her, trying to swallow the lump in my throat away, letting her hold me. "i'm used to you being right there next to me while we get ready, i guess a part of me was scared—."

"oh my god, blaze." she held my arms and looked into my eyes. "i would be crazy to even let that thought cross my mind. i was right in the other room, doing my makeup. i'm right here, im never leaving your side."

"i know, i know, but i just kept getting panicked over it until i couldn't contain it and everyone kept telling me i was being dramatic—." i tried to explain.

"be as dramatic as you want. fuck everyone, today is about you. you're the bride." she told me. "okay?" she shook me, giving me the cutest smile, while waiting for an answer.

"okay." i nodded.

"if you want me to stay, i'll stay." she told me. "i'll get ready right here with you, the hair girl still didn't set up her station."

"no, i don't want you to see my dress yet. i worked too hard on it, and you need to get ready with your bridesmaids." i shook my head.

"okay." she kissed the top of my head. "we gotta save the first kiss for the ceremony." she told me. "call me immediately if you need anything, even if you just need to hear my voice."

"okay." i let out a breathy laugh.

"i can't wait till i see you walking down the aisle with the dress you made. that's crazy! and you'll be my wife." she widened her eyes.

"just a few hours away." i giggled. "okay go! we can't be late for our own wedding."

"it's our wedding, we can do whatever we want." she grinned at me as she made her way out. i could hear her thank mom as all my bridal party poured back in.

my makeup artist assured me that it wasn't a big deal and she fixed my makeup right up before continuing on to the last steps. dad tried to sneak a look at me a few times, but elle was always quick to stop him. i really wanted to have a first look with him, cause even though this wasn't the first time my parents would have seen me in a white dress. this is the first time they really truly approved of this and didn't have an ounce of worry in their system.

they didn't disapprove of luna, they just thought they we were too young and we had never allowed each other to grow individually for a long while.

juniper kept going back and forth between the two rooms we were getting ready in and she kept telling me how pretty mama was and how she told mama how pretty mommy looked. elle's parents had offered to take the girls for a sleep over the night before so we could get ready for a while before we had them with us. but i politely declined. yes, today was about billie and i, but it's also an important day for our family and juniper is our daughter. of course she has to be here the whole time, there was never a question in that.