blaze of desire // billie eilish fanfiction

thirty-one : a boy!

delilah

"hey, are you okay elle?" i realized that she's been quiet. "you're quiet."

"i'm freaking out." she breathed heavily. "i have a feeling that nathan is going to leave soon." she leaned onto the kitchen counter, closing her eyes, trying to even out her breaths.

"did he say something to you?" i asked.

"no but taylor's husband got deployed and they only had a week to get themselves ready and say goodbye. i can't just have a week." she shook her head. "riri is so little and she gets so confused everytime, and maybe it's different now. but she cries a lot when her dad isn't here, she's different when he's gone, he can't leave anytime soon."

"but i thought nathan was here to stay for a while." i frowned.

"i know he's about to get promoted and sometimes marines that get promoted get deployed earlier than expected to be with their unit." she replied. "i just got him back."

"it's not anything official yet elle, you're freaking yourself out. there is a chance you're right, but you may be wrong as well. he's here now right?" i rubbed her back.

"i need to know, i hate being in the dark." she shook my head. "i love him and i don't want him to leave but he loves it and it's his work."

"come here, it's going to be okay ellie." i took her arms and held her tightly in mine. "i've got you, we've got each other."

"delilah, i think i might be pregnant." she sniffled. i pulled back to meet her eyes, she was terrified. "i'm late and you know how irregular my period is, so i'm not sure, but i think..."

"ill order you tests right now, we'll find out together. or you can find out with nathan." i told her.

"no, i don't want to tell him unless it's for sure." she shook his head. "i can't—."

"okay, we won't tell him." i nodded.

"he's going to be back from his run soon." she wiped the tears off her face. "do i look puffy?"

"nathan knows you like the back of his hand." i smiled knowing that he'd know something was up, i couldn't lie to her. "on the bright side my nosey mother is catching up with a friend, so that's one less person to worry about."

"im going to breathe some fresh air." she told me, starting head over to the backyard. the girls noticed her going there and they quickly put on their shoes and went to play in the swings. i ordered different sticks and they arrived right around the time nathan was back home.

when nathan went out to join them after taking a shower, i acted like we had some hot gossip to spill and pulled elle back in. "i'm pregnant, i don't even have to look at the damn sticks." she whispered with a sigh.

"you'll be okay elle, if you're pregnant then iris is going to be a big sissy and the age difference isn't too far away." i told her. "nathan will be here, i know it."

"shut up, because you don't know that." she pointed her finger at me.

"i think the results are here." i told her.

"you flip it." she told me.

"okay..." i flipped one and then the other and then the other and then i looked at her with a smile, "you're pregnant."

"oh my god." she turned around and put her hands on her forehead.

"heyy." i stopped her from pacing around. "this is a good thing okay? everything in the world is hard, this is not different, but you're going to have a little baby again. a little tiny nugget." i softly spoke.